Jade's Babblings
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Sidenote - Friday
In all the chaos of writing about my busy weekend I forgot one other thing that I did on Friday. Joel didn't show up at my house until nine because I was going to go check out Joe's karate class with J from work. J ended up not wanting to go because she was on-call so I went alone. I was nervous all day about it and I'm not sure why. I was just going to watch the kids' class. No big deal. But it was something pretty new, someplace unfamiliar, and also I figured it would be weird to see Joe in such a serious environment.
I showed up and had no idea where to park so I parked right out front. And of course the whole outside of the school is covered in windows so the kids that are waiting for class are staring at me as I sit out there (and later Joe said he saw me too). The class I was going to watch wasn't until 6:15 but I went in around 5:45 because I couldn't just sit out there and read like I was planning on doing.
Walked in to practically the middle of the classroom so I went off to the side to wait in the waiting room and then Joe saw me and waved me over to sit with the parents on the side. I'm told the kids' class is structured differently. they were basically all paired off and Joe and another teacher just walked around the room and helped them out occasionally. I just sat there and watched. I actually enjoyed it though. I mean, it was a little awkward sitting there with the parents and I'm sure some of the kids wondered who the heck the random person was watching them, but it was still neat.
Two boys were practicing right in front of me and when Joe came over to help them with something the boy who was "attacking" asked of the other one, "what if he punches himself in the face instead of me?" I started paying attention, eager to hear Joe's answer to this one... "Well, that'd be a bad day for him then wouldn't it?" Had to cover my face to keep from laughing out loud. I thought that might be inappropriate in such a quiet serious setting.
The school owner came out eventually and walked over to me so I met him and talked to him for about a minute. I felt funny because I had spoken to him on the phone so he knows I"m interested in the adult class and he was like, "You know this is the children's class right?" so I had to say that I was just there to watch Joe teach and I'm thinking "Please don't think we're dating. This is just awkard." lol. Because, really, why else would I be watching a kids' class?... But anyway....
Afterwards I was going to stick around for the next class that I was supposed to watch, but I figured I might as well get going. I talked to Joe for a couple minutes after but another class was starting so I headed out. Oh, it was raining wicked bad that day and I had chosen to wear ballet slippers so that added some fun to my afternoon.
I was sitting there watching those kids in class and they were so cute. Probably not so cute if they tried to beat me up (because they could probably do it) but cute nonetheless. I was thinking about someday when I have kids (if I have kids) taking them to classes like this and sitting there like the other parents... It's kind of a neat thing to think about. It's funny how your opinions on things can change. I was always taught growing up that all kinds of martial arts were bad and violent and that kids should have nothing to do with them. Watching those kids... I didn't see any (except one. lol) who were going to leave that class and go beat up some other unsuspecting kid. I saw children standing there listening attentively to their teacher and showing some serious respect, way beyond the level that most kids their age have probably mastered. I'm still not keen on boy scouts with all the patriotism and training for the military that they mix in, but maybe some self defense stuff wouldn't be that bad some day. I wonder if Joe will still be teaching there. That'd be funny. "Oh ya, I knew your mom..." Being married and happy and having children is a happy thought in and of itself anyway.
Off to go spend some time with the pets. They missed me today. Poor babies.
I showed up and had no idea where to park so I parked right out front. And of course the whole outside of the school is covered in windows so the kids that are waiting for class are staring at me as I sit out there (and later Joe said he saw me too). The class I was going to watch wasn't until 6:15 but I went in around 5:45 because I couldn't just sit out there and read like I was planning on doing.
Walked in to practically the middle of the classroom so I went off to the side to wait in the waiting room and then Joe saw me and waved me over to sit with the parents on the side. I'm told the kids' class is structured differently. they were basically all paired off and Joe and another teacher just walked around the room and helped them out occasionally. I just sat there and watched. I actually enjoyed it though. I mean, it was a little awkward sitting there with the parents and I'm sure some of the kids wondered who the heck the random person was watching them, but it was still neat.
Two boys were practicing right in front of me and when Joe came over to help them with something the boy who was "attacking" asked of the other one, "what if he punches himself in the face instead of me?" I started paying attention, eager to hear Joe's answer to this one... "Well, that'd be a bad day for him then wouldn't it?" Had to cover my face to keep from laughing out loud. I thought that might be inappropriate in such a quiet serious setting.
The school owner came out eventually and walked over to me so I met him and talked to him for about a minute. I felt funny because I had spoken to him on the phone so he knows I"m interested in the adult class and he was like, "You know this is the children's class right?" so I had to say that I was just there to watch Joe teach and I'm thinking "Please don't think we're dating. This is just awkard." lol. Because, really, why else would I be watching a kids' class?... But anyway....
Afterwards I was going to stick around for the next class that I was supposed to watch, but I figured I might as well get going. I talked to Joe for a couple minutes after but another class was starting so I headed out. Oh, it was raining wicked bad that day and I had chosen to wear ballet slippers so that added some fun to my afternoon.
I was sitting there watching those kids in class and they were so cute. Probably not so cute if they tried to beat me up (because they could probably do it) but cute nonetheless. I was thinking about someday when I have kids (if I have kids) taking them to classes like this and sitting there like the other parents... It's kind of a neat thing to think about. It's funny how your opinions on things can change. I was always taught growing up that all kinds of martial arts were bad and violent and that kids should have nothing to do with them. Watching those kids... I didn't see any (except one. lol) who were going to leave that class and go beat up some other unsuspecting kid. I saw children standing there listening attentively to their teacher and showing some serious respect, way beyond the level that most kids their age have probably mastered. I'm still not keen on boy scouts with all the patriotism and training for the military that they mix in, but maybe some self defense stuff wouldn't be that bad some day. I wonder if Joe will still be teaching there. That'd be funny. "Oh ya, I knew your mom..." Being married and happy and having children is a happy thought in and of itself anyway.
Off to go spend some time with the pets. They missed me today. Poor babies.
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
XMen3 * 2
This weekend was amazing and horrible all at the same time. Friday I saw XMen3 with Joel. That was fun. It was my turn to pay so I bought the tickets online. Good thing I did. It wasn't as bad as the Da Vinci Code. We actually got good seats. But it was still sold out.
We were sitting there chatting before the movie and I saw two girls who looked really familiar. It was Sam and Jen, the wife and girlfriend of two guys I went to high school with. They were the ones I had dinner with at pub99 a while back. So I said hi to Sam and I'm not entirely sure she recognized me. But then Kevin came walking over to us and said hi. He seemed happy enough to see me. I introduced him to Joel and we chatted for a minute and then he went to catch up with the girls down front.
The movie was good. I was a bit disappointed and can't really say why without giving it away. I liked x2 better. Yet I went to see x3 again on Sunday. Go fish. But there's a bit more before I get to that.
Saturday was boring during the day. I didn't do much except run some errands and clean. I wasn't sure if Kirsty was coming over but by noon I pretty much figured she wasn't. I think she had a family emergency so I hope everything's okay. I sat around the house until 5 or so and then headed over to Sarah and Paul's. Sarah and I watched the end of Pride and Prejudice in her room because the boys were playing Paul's new xbox. You know guys and video games... There's no tearing them away.
After the movie was over (which Sarah and I "awww"ed to the whole time [why can't real life be like that??]) we watched some Punky Brewster, which I had also brought along on DVD. I have the whole first season. Sarah went out to watch some of the video games and so Sadie and I snuggled up and watched the show together. It was so cute. Around quarter of 11 I heard Sarah and Joe arguing about who was going to go out to the package store. Never good. lol. So Joe ran out and came back with alcohol. Woo hoo.
I was so proud of myself though cuz I didn't have anything to drink. I started my double dose of Paxil on Saturday so I was quite dizzy and thought adding some alcohol to that equaled not good. Paul went to bed a little bit later because we're boring. So Sarah, Joe and I proceeded to stay up all night and watch like four movies that I barely remember because the three of us were talking through most of them. One of those nights where you can't even remember all the topics you covered because you just talked about all types of stuff. Joe was telling me about karate and then we were chatting with Sarah about tons of stuff. It was a great night. I forget what time it was that I asked Joe to teach me something from kenpo but it was light out by that time. So he showed me some. . . star blocks. I think that's what they're called. I've forgotten them by now. Sucks.
Sunday Joe drove over to my house with me so I could take a quick shower and get changed. The fight on the way over there was super fun. Then we went to Paul's parents' house for a memorial day cook out. I hadn't been there since high school. We hung out with his family for about four hours and mostly all beat on each other. Great fun. Then we went over to Joe's parents' for a cook out there. :) Everyone played basketball and I talked to Joe's.... I think she was his sister in law. She is a huge Star Wars fan so we were having some convention talk and I have to remember to send her some Super Mega Fest info so that she and Joe's brother can go. Then Sarah and I took Joe's dog Sasha (she's beautiful) for a walk just to get away from everyone for a bit. Just cuz we'd spent all day with other people's families. And then the four of us went to see x3 (again for me).
Monday was pretty uneventful. I lugged my armor box downstairs so that I could go to ceremony. That hurt. I drove over to Joe's to drop off his eye drops that I had been holding in my purse for him and of course he wasn't home so I left them balanced on the door knob. Then I drove over to Sarah and Paul's and Joe's truck was there... I needed Paul to transfer some files off my work laptop for me. We went outside with Sadie to watch the boys play catch. I got to play with Joe for a bit. Which was funny since I was in my club gear. Playing catch in a dress with knee high boots is difficult. Then we all sat around and played some video games. I got home a little late and crashed on the couch. I skipped out on ceremony for video games... I have issues. But I guess I just thought the night would turn out better. Whatever. I'm over it.
Today was horrible. It's literally 90 degrees in my apartment so I had to run out and buy fans. I can't afford an AC. I just sat around all day and watched TV. Horribly uneventful. What a wasted day off. Back to work tomorrow. I have training on Thursday and Friday. Greeeeat. And then I think I'm on call this weekend. Bah.
I picked up Gunther from my parents' this weekend finally. I missed my buddy. But I dropped off TK and Peachy Keen with them until I can find a home for them. I am SO SAD, but there's nothing I can do. Five birds in this one bedroom apartment is just too much. I hope I can find them a good home where they can stay together. No more pets until I am married and in a house. I'm sick of having to part with them. :(
Oh, and when I got home on Sunday night my neighbor banged on my door at 11:30 at night. She lives next door on teh second floor. She asked me to not leave my outdoor light on all night cuz it shines in her bedroom window. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Get curtains. Anyone? If I think I'm going to be home late I leave my light on. That's how it is. That's what an outdoor light is for. But by that time I was so tired that I just said fine and then she left. I had barely made it home without crashing my car. I was exhausted. Seth called me on my way home to try to keep me awake and I don't even remember talking to him. Augh. I'm still exhausted. I just can't sleep properly.
I'm starting kenpo next week. I have to start keeping myself busy.
We were sitting there chatting before the movie and I saw two girls who looked really familiar. It was Sam and Jen, the wife and girlfriend of two guys I went to high school with. They were the ones I had dinner with at pub99 a while back. So I said hi to Sam and I'm not entirely sure she recognized me. But then Kevin came walking over to us and said hi. He seemed happy enough to see me. I introduced him to Joel and we chatted for a minute and then he went to catch up with the girls down front.
The movie was good. I was a bit disappointed and can't really say why without giving it away. I liked x2 better. Yet I went to see x3 again on Sunday. Go fish. But there's a bit more before I get to that.
Saturday was boring during the day. I didn't do much except run some errands and clean. I wasn't sure if Kirsty was coming over but by noon I pretty much figured she wasn't. I think she had a family emergency so I hope everything's okay. I sat around the house until 5 or so and then headed over to Sarah and Paul's. Sarah and I watched the end of Pride and Prejudice in her room because the boys were playing Paul's new xbox. You know guys and video games... There's no tearing them away.
After the movie was over (which Sarah and I "awww"ed to the whole time [why can't real life be like that??]) we watched some Punky Brewster, which I had also brought along on DVD. I have the whole first season. Sarah went out to watch some of the video games and so Sadie and I snuggled up and watched the show together. It was so cute. Around quarter of 11 I heard Sarah and Joe arguing about who was going to go out to the package store. Never good. lol. So Joe ran out and came back with alcohol. Woo hoo.
I was so proud of myself though cuz I didn't have anything to drink. I started my double dose of Paxil on Saturday so I was quite dizzy and thought adding some alcohol to that equaled not good. Paul went to bed a little bit later because we're boring. So Sarah, Joe and I proceeded to stay up all night and watch like four movies that I barely remember because the three of us were talking through most of them. One of those nights where you can't even remember all the topics you covered because you just talked about all types of stuff. Joe was telling me about karate and then we were chatting with Sarah about tons of stuff. It was a great night. I forget what time it was that I asked Joe to teach me something from kenpo but it was light out by that time. So he showed me some. . . star blocks. I think that's what they're called. I've forgotten them by now. Sucks.
Sunday Joe drove over to my house with me so I could take a quick shower and get changed. The fight on the way over there was super fun. Then we went to Paul's parents' house for a memorial day cook out. I hadn't been there since high school. We hung out with his family for about four hours and mostly all beat on each other. Great fun. Then we went over to Joe's parents' for a cook out there. :) Everyone played basketball and I talked to Joe's.... I think she was his sister in law. She is a huge Star Wars fan so we were having some convention talk and I have to remember to send her some Super Mega Fest info so that she and Joe's brother can go. Then Sarah and I took Joe's dog Sasha (she's beautiful) for a walk just to get away from everyone for a bit. Just cuz we'd spent all day with other people's families. And then the four of us went to see x3 (again for me).
Monday was pretty uneventful. I lugged my armor box downstairs so that I could go to ceremony. That hurt. I drove over to Joe's to drop off his eye drops that I had been holding in my purse for him and of course he wasn't home so I left them balanced on the door knob. Then I drove over to Sarah and Paul's and Joe's truck was there... I needed Paul to transfer some files off my work laptop for me. We went outside with Sadie to watch the boys play catch. I got to play with Joe for a bit. Which was funny since I was in my club gear. Playing catch in a dress with knee high boots is difficult. Then we all sat around and played some video games. I got home a little late and crashed on the couch. I skipped out on ceremony for video games... I have issues. But I guess I just thought the night would turn out better. Whatever. I'm over it.
Today was horrible. It's literally 90 degrees in my apartment so I had to run out and buy fans. I can't afford an AC. I just sat around all day and watched TV. Horribly uneventful. What a wasted day off. Back to work tomorrow. I have training on Thursday and Friday. Greeeeat. And then I think I'm on call this weekend. Bah.
I picked up Gunther from my parents' this weekend finally. I missed my buddy. But I dropped off TK and Peachy Keen with them until I can find a home for them. I am SO SAD, but there's nothing I can do. Five birds in this one bedroom apartment is just too much. I hope I can find them a good home where they can stay together. No more pets until I am married and in a house. I'm sick of having to part with them. :(
Oh, and when I got home on Sunday night my neighbor banged on my door at 11:30 at night. She lives next door on teh second floor. She asked me to not leave my outdoor light on all night cuz it shines in her bedroom window. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Get curtains. Anyone? If I think I'm going to be home late I leave my light on. That's how it is. That's what an outdoor light is for. But by that time I was so tired that I just said fine and then she left. I had barely made it home without crashing my car. I was exhausted. Seth called me on my way home to try to keep me awake and I don't even remember talking to him. Augh. I'm still exhausted. I just can't sleep properly.
I'm starting kenpo next week. I have to start keeping myself busy.
Thursday, May 25, 2006
An Hour is Never Long Enough
Therapy was last night. I told Kerry my story about my dad saying I should date who I want. She thinks I should try to have another conversation with him about it and maybe find out if he and my mom are happy and if they aren't, if it's because of the religious divide. I don't know if my dad and I are really at that point yet. When my Grammy died (his mom) we sat down and talked about how religious she was.... That's why I kept a set of her rosary beads. Not because I believe in it myself but because it was a big part of her life and of my heritage.
Maybe I will talk to him....
I told Kerry about how I don't even trust my judgement in relationships anymore. I've had two huge relationships end and I really don't know where to go from there. It was one of those things that she doesn't really answer for me. Like she doesn't say "that's not true" or "yea, you do have issues". She just kind of sat and listened and then said that she thinks my idea of taking the summer off from making any relationship or religious decisions would be good for me. So I'm not going to put my letter in until at least September and I'm not going to even think about dating anyone or being in a relationship with anyone or whatever until then either.
In the meantime, I'm going to keep myself occupied with work and friends and classes. I'm going to find an American Sign Language class to take because I've always wanted to. I tried teaching myself ASL since 7th grade and I've picked up on a lot of it through books and such but I'd like to take a formal class in it. Obviously work always keeps me busy too. I've got that business trip to California in June. I also found out that I am getting hired! Finally!!! So it will be a slight pay drop but I'll have vacation/holiday hours and health insurance.
I was talking to J at work yesterday saying how Joe was telling me I could come watch him teach sometime (something I think would be interesting) if I took a beginner karate class... J was like "oh my god, I'll take it with you". I was so shocked at that but it seems like a really good way for us to hang out so I figured why not. I called the school and left a message but haven't heard back yet. They need a secretary or something. Hey, I could use some extra money. haha. Anyway, I think it would be really interesting to take that class with J.... if we ever hear back about it. In the meantime she's going to check out prices at a karate place down the street from her. But I think that they are different types because Webster Institute is kenpo and this one isn't I don't think. But if we don't hear back we'll just take one near her house. It's mostly for the excercise anyway. Not that it wouldn't be cool to go to the one Joe teaches at but I don't think I'd even see him anyway.
The lovebirds are driving me crazy. They are so loud. I was seriously considering rehoming TK and Peachy yesterday. But Peachy just finally trusts people again. I'd hate to mess her up. Plus, how will I ever be the crazy bird lady if I find homes for all my birds?? My mom already wants to keep Gunther... That's not happening though. He and Button are my favorites.
so yea, therapy went well...Today my friend Joel is coming over after work just to hang out which should be cool. And then of course, since we're movie buddies, he's going to see xmen3 with me tomorrow night. Then on Saturday Kirsty is supposed to come over and see my new apartment at which point we might go out and say hi to Sarah and Sadie and then I have no idea what's happening that night but I know I'm not drinking because now that I"m on Paxil all it does is make me sleepy so it's not worth it. Meeting on Sunday cuz I promised Dawn and then I have Monday off for Memorial Day and I took Tuesday off because I'm going to Ceremony in Boston for their Star Wars night on Monday. Should be a blast.
Maybe I will talk to him....
I told Kerry about how I don't even trust my judgement in relationships anymore. I've had two huge relationships end and I really don't know where to go from there. It was one of those things that she doesn't really answer for me. Like she doesn't say "that's not true" or "yea, you do have issues". She just kind of sat and listened and then said that she thinks my idea of taking the summer off from making any relationship or religious decisions would be good for me. So I'm not going to put my letter in until at least September and I'm not going to even think about dating anyone or being in a relationship with anyone or whatever until then either.
In the meantime, I'm going to keep myself occupied with work and friends and classes. I'm going to find an American Sign Language class to take because I've always wanted to. I tried teaching myself ASL since 7th grade and I've picked up on a lot of it through books and such but I'd like to take a formal class in it. Obviously work always keeps me busy too. I've got that business trip to California in June. I also found out that I am getting hired! Finally!!! So it will be a slight pay drop but I'll have vacation/holiday hours and health insurance.
I was talking to J at work yesterday saying how Joe was telling me I could come watch him teach sometime (something I think would be interesting) if I took a beginner karate class... J was like "oh my god, I'll take it with you". I was so shocked at that but it seems like a really good way for us to hang out so I figured why not. I called the school and left a message but haven't heard back yet. They need a secretary or something. Hey, I could use some extra money. haha. Anyway, I think it would be really interesting to take that class with J.... if we ever hear back about it. In the meantime she's going to check out prices at a karate place down the street from her. But I think that they are different types because Webster Institute is kenpo and this one isn't I don't think. But if we don't hear back we'll just take one near her house. It's mostly for the excercise anyway. Not that it wouldn't be cool to go to the one Joe teaches at but I don't think I'd even see him anyway.
The lovebirds are driving me crazy. They are so loud. I was seriously considering rehoming TK and Peachy yesterday. But Peachy just finally trusts people again. I'd hate to mess her up. Plus, how will I ever be the crazy bird lady if I find homes for all my birds?? My mom already wants to keep Gunther... That's not happening though. He and Button are my favorites.
so yea, therapy went well...Today my friend Joel is coming over after work just to hang out which should be cool. And then of course, since we're movie buddies, he's going to see xmen3 with me tomorrow night. Then on Saturday Kirsty is supposed to come over and see my new apartment at which point we might go out and say hi to Sarah and Sadie and then I have no idea what's happening that night but I know I'm not drinking because now that I"m on Paxil all it does is make me sleepy so it's not worth it. Meeting on Sunday cuz I promised Dawn and then I have Monday off for Memorial Day and I took Tuesday off because I'm going to Ceremony in Boston for their Star Wars night on Monday. Should be a blast.
Monday, May 22, 2006
What did I DO???
Is the subject line curious enough?
Ever since I broke up with John I've been hearing about how I should go back to college. My mom, Paul, Joe, etc... I think my mom just wants me to keep busy so I won't date anyone. My friends are slightly better-intentioned. :)
I started researching online universities. There's the University of Phoenix, Devry.... And of course colleges around here offer online courses - Nichols, Quinsig, Worcester State...
I filled out a couple online forms for more info and a half hour later got a call from Phoenix. So I talked to a counselor for about 45 minutes on the phone.
I have an appointment to talk more about course offerings tomorrow... What am I thinking? I can't go back to school. I hated school. Well, except for my English courses. And this wouldn't be English. It would be a business degree. Though they are phasing out their associates degrees and going just to bachelors. I told the guy I didn't want to be in school for 8 years trying to earn a 4 year degree. But he said with 2 1/2 years of full-time education behind me (I went to Worcester State right out of high school, thank god) it would only take me about 2 more years to earn my bachelors. I've got to be insane. I have no time in my life right now. Or money.
I tried texting Joe to see where you're supposed to inquire about online stuff at Nichols and get the info on that but never heard back. I think I might have found the right section on the website though so that's good. It looks like they do offer complete online degrees.
I don't know. I feel like I want to "better" my life a bit, especially now that I'm on my own and have a bit more time. But then again, I do have committment issues so maybe committing to college isn't the best plan for me. Okay, that's not true. I don't have issues. Well, I have issues but not with that. Oh crap. I forgot to take my Paxil. Sounds like I planned to put that in the story but I really didn't. Time to go take that and finish watching Everwood and stop thinking about all of this.
Ever since I broke up with John I've been hearing about how I should go back to college. My mom, Paul, Joe, etc... I think my mom just wants me to keep busy so I won't date anyone. My friends are slightly better-intentioned. :)
I started researching online universities. There's the University of Phoenix, Devry.... And of course colleges around here offer online courses - Nichols, Quinsig, Worcester State...
I filled out a couple online forms for more info and a half hour later got a call from Phoenix. So I talked to a counselor for about 45 minutes on the phone.
I have an appointment to talk more about course offerings tomorrow... What am I thinking? I can't go back to school. I hated school. Well, except for my English courses. And this wouldn't be English. It would be a business degree. Though they are phasing out their associates degrees and going just to bachelors. I told the guy I didn't want to be in school for 8 years trying to earn a 4 year degree. But he said with 2 1/2 years of full-time education behind me (I went to Worcester State right out of high school, thank god) it would only take me about 2 more years to earn my bachelors. I've got to be insane. I have no time in my life right now. Or money.
I tried texting Joe to see where you're supposed to inquire about online stuff at Nichols and get the info on that but never heard back. I think I might have found the right section on the website though so that's good. It looks like they do offer complete online degrees.
I don't know. I feel like I want to "better" my life a bit, especially now that I'm on my own and have a bit more time. But then again, I do have committment issues so maybe committing to college isn't the best plan for me. Okay, that's not true. I don't have issues. Well, I have issues but not with that. Oh crap. I forgot to take my Paxil. Sounds like I planned to put that in the story but I really didn't. Time to go take that and finish watching Everwood and stop thinking about all of this.
Things I've Learned
When trash day is Monday and you are worried that you'll forget if you don't put it outside on the porch away from where the dog can get at it, don't do it. I say this because even when you think you are safe because you live on a busy street and it's not exactly the country, you are in fact very much not safe.
Because soon you will hear creepy rustling noises coming from outside your door and your dog will start growling menacingly and freaking you out. And then you slowly approach the door and then flip on the light and whip up the blinds all in one frantic movement.
And what do you see out on that porch in the middle of the night?
The biggest racoon I have ever seen in my life!! The thing was huge. I'm not even kidding you. It could have eaten me. I managed to scare it off by tapping on the window and begging it to leave. It looked at me with its big brown eyes and probably heard the pleading in my tone and finally meandered off down my stairs. After which I flung open the door, grabbed the trash, and slammed the door shut again as I locked it. We all slept safe last night folks.
Because soon you will hear creepy rustling noises coming from outside your door and your dog will start growling menacingly and freaking you out. And then you slowly approach the door and then flip on the light and whip up the blinds all in one frantic movement.
And what do you see out on that porch in the middle of the night?
The biggest racoon I have ever seen in my life!! The thing was huge. I'm not even kidding you. It could have eaten me. I managed to scare it off by tapping on the window and begging it to leave. It looked at me with its big brown eyes and probably heard the pleading in my tone and finally meandered off down my stairs. After which I flung open the door, grabbed the trash, and slammed the door shut again as I locked it. We all slept safe last night folks.
Sunday, May 21, 2006
Under the Tuscan Sun
I'm going to go buy a villa in Tuscany and become a writer. I've decided just now. The lovebirds can come too and they can have an outdoor aviary that's huge for them to fly around in. Pixel and Amelie can have a big fenced in yard to run around in and Gunther can have his own bird room. I'll write outside in the sun all day and have a writing desk inside for bad days. With my inspirational gourd birdhouse from Aunt Mary hanging over the desk.
Maybe it won't exactly be Tuscany, but you know the more I live on my own and learn that I can pretty much just depend on myself, the more I want to try a new type of life. As different as possible. I don't want to fall into a rut in my life and fall back on old habits. So I'm moving.
Okay, not really. But it's nice to sit back and dream.
"What are four walls, anyway? They are what they contain. The house protects the dreamer. Unthinkably good things can happen, even late in the game. It's such a surprise."
The movie was lovely on Friday. The crowd was mostly okay, but we got there a little late so we were stuck in the very front row. I'm pretty sure Joel and I are going to see xmen3 next Friday too. We're going to try for a later show so that maybe not so many teenagers will be there.
Lunch was delightful on Friday. We went to pub99. I drove. J rode in shotgun and found the pinwheel I had bought for Sadie that she forgot. So we're driving and she's got the window rolled down with the pinwheel out of it. . . I swear, I thought it was going to fly off and take someone's eye out. Oh, and she kept turning around and stabbing B with it. lol.
The four of us were sitting there at lunch chatting and J leaned over and said, "Can I ask you what exactly happened between you and John?"
So I told her about some of it; it was probably the 1 1/2 minutes explanation.
Then she says, "I hope you don't mind me saying this, but you just seem so much happier. It's like you are a totally different person. I don't even recognize you."
"Well, that's because I am a different person. I'm the girl I was when I was in high school, before I settled down at entirely too young an age and got married.."
"Well, I'm very proud of you for making such a tough and mature decision. I'm just so proud of you, hun."
I couldn't believe she said that. It was so kind of her. I feel like I have grown so much closer to the girls at work lately. Maybe I am a different person. Maybe some of the negativity going around really was just because of me. Not all of it, but some. Maybe things will be better now.
maybe, maybe, maybe. Maybe someday I'll have a few of my dreams come true. :)
Maybe it won't exactly be Tuscany, but you know the more I live on my own and learn that I can pretty much just depend on myself, the more I want to try a new type of life. As different as possible. I don't want to fall into a rut in my life and fall back on old habits. So I'm moving.
Okay, not really. But it's nice to sit back and dream.
"What are four walls, anyway? They are what they contain. The house protects the dreamer. Unthinkably good things can happen, even late in the game. It's such a surprise."
The movie was lovely on Friday. The crowd was mostly okay, but we got there a little late so we were stuck in the very front row. I'm pretty sure Joel and I are going to see xmen3 next Friday too. We're going to try for a later show so that maybe not so many teenagers will be there.
Lunch was delightful on Friday. We went to pub99. I drove. J rode in shotgun and found the pinwheel I had bought for Sadie that she forgot. So we're driving and she's got the window rolled down with the pinwheel out of it. . . I swear, I thought it was going to fly off and take someone's eye out. Oh, and she kept turning around and stabbing B with it. lol.
The four of us were sitting there at lunch chatting and J leaned over and said, "Can I ask you what exactly happened between you and John?"
So I told her about some of it; it was probably the 1 1/2 minutes explanation.
Then she says, "I hope you don't mind me saying this, but you just seem so much happier. It's like you are a totally different person. I don't even recognize you."
"Well, that's because I am a different person. I'm the girl I was when I was in high school, before I settled down at entirely too young an age and got married.."
"Well, I'm very proud of you for making such a tough and mature decision. I'm just so proud of you, hun."
I couldn't believe she said that. It was so kind of her. I feel like I have grown so much closer to the girls at work lately. Maybe I am a different person. Maybe some of the negativity going around really was just because of me. Not all of it, but some. Maybe things will be better now.
maybe, maybe, maybe. Maybe someday I'll have a few of my dreams come true. :)
Friday, May 19, 2006
C-3PO wasn't gay, he was British.
The series finale of Will&Grace aired last night. At 8:00 they had an hour long "goodbye" special that I was surprised I stayed awake for. Around 7:30 I had started to nod off on the couch while watching Everybody Loves Raymond reruns. I'm just so tired. No more staying up until 2 a.m. on a Wednesday... That's reserved for Thursdays.
Shock of all shocks I was home alone last night... But it was all good since I got to watch W&G and then the season finale of ER. I did actually stay awake, yes. I felt so dumb but I got all teary at the end of Will and Grace. It was cute. I wish I had written down some of the quotes from it cuz they were hilarious. You know you're getting older when stuff like that and random commercials make you cry.
Surprisingly enough ER did nothing for me. I understand they want to end the seasons on a cliffhanger so that you'll come back and watch when it starts up again, but really. . . there's no way all this crap would happen to one hospital. Abbey's 8 months pregnant and just cuz she falls and hits her head they make it look like she's gonna lose the baby and all this... Very frustrating.
What's that you ask?. . .
Oh, of course I'll be tuned in come September.
It's 10:30 a.m. Today is Friday which rocks. It's jeans day at work, but I like to call it "chucks day" since I can regularly be seen skipping (just a bit) down the work hallways in my nice comfy chucks. The girls and I have started a tradition of going out for lunch on Fridays. It's probably a dumb thing to do with my budget but I just cut back on stuff on the weekend then. Besides, it's worth it to get out of here for an hour and just go spend time together outside of work. That way we aren't at each other's throats.
Though that situation is about to get a bit better. For three of us anyway... They found a spare one-person cubicle down the hallway and they are sticking two of us in there and the other three will stay here in the slightly larger cube. J and I volunteered to go but everyone thought it would be more fair if we drew names. So it's actually going to be T and I who go. . . Which is fine.
So I've got lunch to look forward to in a couple hours and then at 5:00 I get to go home and get ready to go out to see The Da Vinci Code. I'm verily excited. At least I'll actually be out doing something instead of just sitting around the house waiting for people to call or get out of work or whatever.
Speaking of, I'm pretty sure Sarah and Paul have dropped off the face of the earth. I know, sad, but true. ;)
For some reason, J was just talking about "carnie workers" randomly with L and B. I leaned over (gotta get around the dividing wall... sigh) and said how my ex husband and his brother used to work at carnivals in New England. J was silent for a minute and then says, "Jessie, why do you keep giving me material??"
I thought for a second and said, "Well, J, cuz I like to make you happy."
They've already got all the geek stuff on me - binary jokes, the 501st, etc etc. Eh, whatever. We all have fun. :)
Shock of all shocks I was home alone last night... But it was all good since I got to watch W&G and then the season finale of ER. I did actually stay awake, yes. I felt so dumb but I got all teary at the end of Will and Grace. It was cute. I wish I had written down some of the quotes from it cuz they were hilarious. You know you're getting older when stuff like that and random commercials make you cry.
Surprisingly enough ER did nothing for me. I understand they want to end the seasons on a cliffhanger so that you'll come back and watch when it starts up again, but really. . . there's no way all this crap would happen to one hospital. Abbey's 8 months pregnant and just cuz she falls and hits her head they make it look like she's gonna lose the baby and all this... Very frustrating.
What's that you ask?. . .
Oh, of course I'll be tuned in come September.
It's 10:30 a.m. Today is Friday which rocks. It's jeans day at work, but I like to call it "chucks day" since I can regularly be seen skipping (just a bit) down the work hallways in my nice comfy chucks. The girls and I have started a tradition of going out for lunch on Fridays. It's probably a dumb thing to do with my budget but I just cut back on stuff on the weekend then. Besides, it's worth it to get out of here for an hour and just go spend time together outside of work. That way we aren't at each other's throats.
Though that situation is about to get a bit better. For three of us anyway... They found a spare one-person cubicle down the hallway and they are sticking two of us in there and the other three will stay here in the slightly larger cube. J and I volunteered to go but everyone thought it would be more fair if we drew names. So it's actually going to be T and I who go. . . Which is fine.
So I've got lunch to look forward to in a couple hours and then at 5:00 I get to go home and get ready to go out to see The Da Vinci Code. I'm verily excited. At least I'll actually be out doing something instead of just sitting around the house waiting for people to call or get out of work or whatever.
Speaking of, I'm pretty sure Sarah and Paul have dropped off the face of the earth. I know, sad, but true. ;)
For some reason, J was just talking about "carnie workers" randomly with L and B. I leaned over (gotta get around the dividing wall... sigh) and said how my ex husband and his brother used to work at carnivals in New England. J was silent for a minute and then says, "Jessie, why do you keep giving me material??"
I thought for a second and said, "Well, J, cuz I like to make you happy."
They've already got all the geek stuff on me - binary jokes, the 501st, etc etc. Eh, whatever. We all have fun. :)
Thursday, May 18, 2006
I'll have pancakes in the age of enlightenment
Yesterday I left work a little early cuz I had a huge headache and I needed to go home and take something. I did that and then I took Pixel out to play with the next door neighbor's dog Bailey. I wish that he and his girlfriend lived downstairs from me because when I mentioned having moved the lovebirds in he was like, "Oh, I love birds. they're not that noisy at all." You could hear them OUTSIDE! lol. So I'm wishing he was downstairs instead because I haven't seen my downstairs neighbor since I moved the lovies in and I'm just waiting to get an angry phone call or visit from the landlord....
Anyway. . . Eric came over last night. Kind of spur of the moment thing. We were both free so he came over to see the new apartment. We ran across the street to get pizza from Leicester pizza house and it was actually really good. We waited for it to be ready so we got to sit and chat for about 15 minutes in there.
I told Eric to pick out a movie of mine that he wanted to see and if he couldn't find anything we'd run down the street to rent something. He picked out Swingers (ah, a guy after my own heart. lol) because I keep telling everyone about it and he hadn't seen it yet. So we watched that and laughed and compared how guys act in real life to how they are in the movie. It's pretty similiar I'm thinking. ;) That of course led to a discussion about playing games with people when you should really just tell them whether you're interested or not... We watched another movie too that he hadn't seen - How to lose a guy in ten days. That was pretty funny. It's a chick flick, but guys enjoy it too. And then we got into discussions about high school and the people we knew then (::cough cough:: jess b...) and the whole being disfellowshipped thing and all that. That's what I always loved about Eric - complete goofiness can turn to a serious discussion in moments and then back again.
So that was a good time. He ended up staying until about 2 a.m. Time flies. I barely even registered how late it was. Then I got to sleep until the blessed hour of 5:30 when Seth called and woke me up and the lovebirds started screaming about the same time. The time difference between where he is (Cali) and here is killer. I went back to sleep until 6 and then got up in a haze and showered and fed the pets and took Pixel out for her walk and all that. I uncovered the two lovie cages, but before I left I actually covered Justarius and Button back up because Justarius was being SO BAD. He would not stop yelling. It was horrible.
I actually made it to work without falling asleep on the pike, which was a lovely surprise. and now I'm here wishing the day would end.
One of the girls at my work told me that she read some reviews of the da vinci code movie and people said it was too long. It's only 2 hours people! Suck it up and at least pretend to be intelligent and get it. Augh. I can't wait to see it. I guess Joel bought tickets for the 7:30 show tomorrow night so at least we know we have them. I'd hate to get there and have it be sold out. I'm really looking forward to it.
Now that I finished reading that, here's the next book I'm on to. B wants to know if she can borrow some of my Jane Green novels for the flight to Cali in June. She and J are going and then I'm going the next week with L and T. B is really nervous, about as much as me, about the flight so she wants something to distract her. It's too bad we can't fly together because at least we both get how the other one is feeling and could probably distract each other. But oh well.
It's only 9:21. I need to be rescued from here. Joe texted last night and asked if I was busy today but who knows what will come of that. I'm sure if I texted now to ask what time he wants to hang out I'd get some ambiguous answer so I'm just not bothering.
. . . .Wow, I am in quite the bitchy mood right now aren't I? Time to go take a quick walk around the building....
Anyway. . . Eric came over last night. Kind of spur of the moment thing. We were both free so he came over to see the new apartment. We ran across the street to get pizza from Leicester pizza house and it was actually really good. We waited for it to be ready so we got to sit and chat for about 15 minutes in there.
I told Eric to pick out a movie of mine that he wanted to see and if he couldn't find anything we'd run down the street to rent something. He picked out Swingers (ah, a guy after my own heart. lol) because I keep telling everyone about it and he hadn't seen it yet. So we watched that and laughed and compared how guys act in real life to how they are in the movie. It's pretty similiar I'm thinking. ;) That of course led to a discussion about playing games with people when you should really just tell them whether you're interested or not... We watched another movie too that he hadn't seen - How to lose a guy in ten days. That was pretty funny. It's a chick flick, but guys enjoy it too. And then we got into discussions about high school and the people we knew then (::cough cough:: jess b...) and the whole being disfellowshipped thing and all that. That's what I always loved about Eric - complete goofiness can turn to a serious discussion in moments and then back again.
So that was a good time. He ended up staying until about 2 a.m. Time flies. I barely even registered how late it was. Then I got to sleep until the blessed hour of 5:30 when Seth called and woke me up and the lovebirds started screaming about the same time. The time difference between where he is (Cali) and here is killer. I went back to sleep until 6 and then got up in a haze and showered and fed the pets and took Pixel out for her walk and all that. I uncovered the two lovie cages, but before I left I actually covered Justarius and Button back up because Justarius was being SO BAD. He would not stop yelling. It was horrible.
I actually made it to work without falling asleep on the pike, which was a lovely surprise. and now I'm here wishing the day would end.
One of the girls at my work told me that she read some reviews of the da vinci code movie and people said it was too long. It's only 2 hours people! Suck it up and at least pretend to be intelligent and get it. Augh. I can't wait to see it. I guess Joel bought tickets for the 7:30 show tomorrow night so at least we know we have them. I'd hate to get there and have it be sold out. I'm really looking forward to it.
Now that I finished reading that, here's the next book I'm on to. B wants to know if she can borrow some of my Jane Green novels for the flight to Cali in June. She and J are going and then I'm going the next week with L and T. B is really nervous, about as much as me, about the flight so she wants something to distract her. It's too bad we can't fly together because at least we both get how the other one is feeling and could probably distract each other. But oh well.
It's only 9:21. I need to be rescued from here. Joe texted last night and asked if I was busy today but who knows what will come of that. I'm sure if I texted now to ask what time he wants to hang out I'd get some ambiguous answer so I'm just not bothering.
. . . .Wow, I am in quite the bitchy mood right now aren't I? Time to go take a quick walk around the building....
Monday, May 15, 2006
The Weekend from Hell (except for a few sunny spots)
This was easily the worst on call weekend I have ever had. I have had difficult cases before that take you a couple hours to work out and such but this was ridiculous. It started Friday night on my way home from the 501st event.
A quick side note on that - it was a lot of fun and I'm really glad I went. Bagpipe music is a lot of fun and I always love doing the 501st events that are smaller and only involve a few of us. It was me, Jason, Justin, Chris and John (not my John, another one). I took photos all night and talked with some firefighters and EMTs a little bit. The firefighters seemed ticked off about having their pics taken, but then later they cornered me and asked why I didn't take more pictures.... ? Also, the guy running it must have thought there was no way that there would ever be women in the 501st because he would never look at me directly and he kept talking to the guys and asking questions even if I was standing right in front of him. I hate that. Made me wish I had suited up. But taking pictures was more practical.
Anyhoo... I got a call about ten minutes from my house on my way home Friday and thus began the weekend from hell. This customer needed keys for a switch... And the ones they had were already used. They're a one-time use only so this presents a problem. The people wanted me to "magic" some up for them or something. They kept putting me on these con calls (until 1 a.m.!!!) and saying "well, it's midnight here. where am I supposed to get a sales order?" while I'm thinking "it's 1 a.m. here... how do you want me to help you??"
I finally got to go to bed and then Saturday morning I had to run out to the bank and the post office because I pay my rent weekly (don't ask). On my way to the bank I get another phone call on another issue so I have to rush through all of that stuff and then go right home again to take care of the call. Then I packed up Pixel and my laundry and headed over to my parents' house where fortunately I didn't get any calls.
On my way home from there I got yet another call. So I had to rush Pixel upstairs, log in to my computer, take care of that, and then run downstairs and get the poor lovebirds out of my car. I had finally picked them up from my parents' house. So I brought them in from the rain. It is STILL raining. Augh.
Then I thought maybe I'd get together with Sarah, Paul and Joe, but it turned out the boys were out repoing so I stayed home. Sarah and I were feeling lazy about meeting up I guess. She had Sadie too. We ended up talking online while we watched "The Object of my Affection" which was fun. We had a nice chat about life, the universe, and everything (douglas adams, people... look it up).
So then on Sunday I skipped the meeting because I was so tired from the on call stuff and I called my dad to see if he was going to bring their old bed over. It's only a full but it's better than a twin and I'll take anything at this point to get me out of that bed. So he came over and we switched out the beds. I never want to move again...
he brought me over their old microwave and my Grammy's old mixer too. That was nice of them.
We ran over to Home Depot to get some boards because the bed frame is slightly bigger than the matress. On our way home I was telling him about the 501st event and we had the oddest discussion.
"So, did you meet any single firefighters?"
::picture me just staring at him as we drive:: "Um... well, I guess some of them were single, but I didn't ask."
"Oh."
"Besides, it wouldn't have mattered anyway."
"Why not?" he asks.
"Because... Mom would freak out."
"Why?"
"Because none of the firefighters would be JWs."
"So?" he asks, seemingly perplexed by the statement.
"Well..." I hesitate, wondering just how much I'm allowed to say in this discussion. "Well, she wants me to get reinstated and marry a nice Witness boy."
"Is that what you want?"
I hesitate again. This could be a really heavy question... "...No."
"Well, then..."
"Sorry, Dad, we haven't gotten to that part in therapy yet where I decide I have to do what's right for me."
And then we moved on to other things.
. . . My dad is on my side.... my dad is on my side.... How cool is that? As Joe said when I was telling him about it, "There aren't any sides." and he's right I guess. But with Mom it sometimes seems like there are sides is all. I'm so happy about that. Not that I'm planning on dating right now, but that if/when I do it won't matter to my dad what religion the guy is.
So then we set up the bed and he headed home. I think I got one on call call shortly after that and then I was just sitting around watching movies on WE so I needed to get some air. I ran across the street and down a ways to Cumberland Farms to get milk and a sandwich. In the rain. Fun.
Then I came home and I was watching some more TV and reading my Bird Talk magazine when Joel IMed me and asked if I was up for some company. Which of course I was. We hadn't seen each other in 12 years so I didn't know how awkward it was going to be, but I don't think it was at all really. We sat there and chatted about some of the kids we went to school with... movies...what we're up to now in life. Pixel was her usual annoyingly cute self. I have such a hard time disciplining her. Brat. :) Joel works third shift so he had to leave around quarter of 8. We're going to see that movie on Friday still, though, so that should be a blast.
After that I watched the series finale of West Wing and didn't cry (so proud of myself) and then I watched Tom Hanks on "inside the actor's studio" where they talked about and showed scenes from The Da Vinci Code. The show was sponsored by the movie so I'm not surprised. It was interesting though. And then I think I just watched some mindless nick at nite and then went to bed in my nice big bed. :)
The on-call phone woke me up at 2:30 a.m. ......
Then the lovebirds woke me up at 6:00. I went in to work two hours late because if I had gotten up at 6 and come in I would have had to hurt someone.
And now here I am at work. It's only noon. I'm trying to wait until at least 1 to go get lunch so that it'll break up my day a bit more. Tomorrow I get to leave a bit early for a doctor's appointment and then I've gotta get through the rest of the week before Friday rolls around.
Next week will be busy too. I've got a hair appointment with Kimmy (cutting it short again just because I can) on Tuesday, another doctor's appointment on Wednesday, and then xmen 3 opens on Friday and I'm hoping I can go see that at some point.
So that was my on call weekend. If I never hear that guys' voice again it will be too soon. Off to do some more work. I guess I should since I'm at work and that's what you do... ;)
A quick side note on that - it was a lot of fun and I'm really glad I went. Bagpipe music is a lot of fun and I always love doing the 501st events that are smaller and only involve a few of us. It was me, Jason, Justin, Chris and John (not my John, another one). I took photos all night and talked with some firefighters and EMTs a little bit. The firefighters seemed ticked off about having their pics taken, but then later they cornered me and asked why I didn't take more pictures.... ? Also, the guy running it must have thought there was no way that there would ever be women in the 501st because he would never look at me directly and he kept talking to the guys and asking questions even if I was standing right in front of him. I hate that. Made me wish I had suited up. But taking pictures was more practical.
Anyhoo... I got a call about ten minutes from my house on my way home Friday and thus began the weekend from hell. This customer needed keys for a switch... And the ones they had were already used. They're a one-time use only so this presents a problem. The people wanted me to "magic" some up for them or something. They kept putting me on these con calls (until 1 a.m.!!!) and saying "well, it's midnight here. where am I supposed to get a sales order?" while I'm thinking "it's 1 a.m. here... how do you want me to help you??"
I finally got to go to bed and then Saturday morning I had to run out to the bank and the post office because I pay my rent weekly (don't ask). On my way to the bank I get another phone call on another issue so I have to rush through all of that stuff and then go right home again to take care of the call. Then I packed up Pixel and my laundry and headed over to my parents' house where fortunately I didn't get any calls.
On my way home from there I got yet another call. So I had to rush Pixel upstairs, log in to my computer, take care of that, and then run downstairs and get the poor lovebirds out of my car. I had finally picked them up from my parents' house. So I brought them in from the rain. It is STILL raining. Augh.
Then I thought maybe I'd get together with Sarah, Paul and Joe, but it turned out the boys were out repoing so I stayed home. Sarah and I were feeling lazy about meeting up I guess. She had Sadie too. We ended up talking online while we watched "The Object of my Affection" which was fun. We had a nice chat about life, the universe, and everything (douglas adams, people... look it up).
So then on Sunday I skipped the meeting because I was so tired from the on call stuff and I called my dad to see if he was going to bring their old bed over. It's only a full but it's better than a twin and I'll take anything at this point to get me out of that bed. So he came over and we switched out the beds. I never want to move again...
he brought me over their old microwave and my Grammy's old mixer too. That was nice of them.
We ran over to Home Depot to get some boards because the bed frame is slightly bigger than the matress. On our way home I was telling him about the 501st event and we had the oddest discussion.
"So, did you meet any single firefighters?"
::picture me just staring at him as we drive:: "Um... well, I guess some of them were single, but I didn't ask."
"Oh."
"Besides, it wouldn't have mattered anyway."
"Why not?" he asks.
"Because... Mom would freak out."
"Why?"
"Because none of the firefighters would be JWs."
"So?" he asks, seemingly perplexed by the statement.
"Well..." I hesitate, wondering just how much I'm allowed to say in this discussion. "Well, she wants me to get reinstated and marry a nice Witness boy."
"Is that what you want?"
I hesitate again. This could be a really heavy question... "...No."
"Well, then..."
"Sorry, Dad, we haven't gotten to that part in therapy yet where I decide I have to do what's right for me."
And then we moved on to other things.
. . . My dad is on my side.... my dad is on my side.... How cool is that? As Joe said when I was telling him about it, "There aren't any sides." and he's right I guess. But with Mom it sometimes seems like there are sides is all. I'm so happy about that. Not that I'm planning on dating right now, but that if/when I do it won't matter to my dad what religion the guy is.
So then we set up the bed and he headed home. I think I got one on call call shortly after that and then I was just sitting around watching movies on WE so I needed to get some air. I ran across the street and down a ways to Cumberland Farms to get milk and a sandwich. In the rain. Fun.
Then I came home and I was watching some more TV and reading my Bird Talk magazine when Joel IMed me and asked if I was up for some company. Which of course I was. We hadn't seen each other in 12 years so I didn't know how awkward it was going to be, but I don't think it was at all really. We sat there and chatted about some of the kids we went to school with... movies...what we're up to now in life. Pixel was her usual annoyingly cute self. I have such a hard time disciplining her. Brat. :) Joel works third shift so he had to leave around quarter of 8. We're going to see that movie on Friday still, though, so that should be a blast.
After that I watched the series finale of West Wing and didn't cry (so proud of myself) and then I watched Tom Hanks on "inside the actor's studio" where they talked about and showed scenes from The Da Vinci Code. The show was sponsored by the movie so I'm not surprised. It was interesting though. And then I think I just watched some mindless nick at nite and then went to bed in my nice big bed. :)
The on-call phone woke me up at 2:30 a.m. ......
Then the lovebirds woke me up at 6:00. I went in to work two hours late because if I had gotten up at 6 and come in I would have had to hurt someone.
And now here I am at work. It's only noon. I'm trying to wait until at least 1 to go get lunch so that it'll break up my day a bit more. Tomorrow I get to leave a bit early for a doctor's appointment and then I've gotta get through the rest of the week before Friday rolls around.
Next week will be busy too. I've got a hair appointment with Kimmy (cutting it short again just because I can) on Tuesday, another doctor's appointment on Wednesday, and then xmen 3 opens on Friday and I'm hoping I can go see that at some point.
So that was my on call weekend. If I never hear that guys' voice again it will be too soon. Off to do some more work. I guess I should since I'm at work and that's what you do... ;)
Friday, May 12, 2006
The Sole Proprietor
This is where Joe, Paul, Sarah, Sadie and I went for dinner last night. It was kind of random. Paul called me to tell me that Joe had asked the sole if Ericka was working last night. I'm pretty sure he did it as a joke to annoy me cuz Sarah and I just LOVE watching everyone flirt with Ericka. . . lol. But I kind of thought, "Eh, why not?" I haven't seen her in about three years, haven't talked to her in two.
The last time we spoke was through text messages and it was right after I left Ray. I felt like everyone was taking "his side", which was hard not to do I'll grant you that, and I kind of withdrew from everyone. I love going to the Sole to see Ericka. It's always a good time. This noisy restaurant in the middle of Worcester. . .
Maybe I should explain who Ericka is. She's in my reference entry, but you people are lazy so you probably haven't read it. Ericka is my big sister. Our families were close enough that had my parents died when I was younger they were going to leave me to Ericka's parents. Craziness. She was the leader of our little group of JWs but she doesn't do much with it anymore. She's on the very outskirts of the religion, which is fine. But it hasn't given me occasion to talk to her much lately. The best part about Ericka was she never cared what anyone else thought.
So we showed up there and I asked if Ericka [insert last name here] was working. They said "yes, but it's not [insert old last name here] anymore; it's [insert new last name here]." Turns out she got married two weeks ago to her boyfriend who also happens to work with her! And she's pregnant. If you had EVER told me that Ericka would be settled down with a family before I was I would have laughed in your face. She just wasn't the type. too free-spirited. But now. . . wow. She's still the same Ericka, but she's changed too. I'm so happy for her. We exhanged numbers of course and I hope we actually stick to our plans to get together.
She seemed happy to see us and she went nuts over Sadie saying how cute she was and taking her on a tour of the restaurant and stuff. When she first came over to us she didn't recognize Joe. That was totally hilarious. At first I thought she was kidding because she totally ignored him and then when he said hi to her she said "Oh, I didn't know if you were with them or not." We all kind of stared at her until Joe said, "I'm Joe [insert HIS last name here]." and then she got it. THAT is a good story. lol. I'll be living off that one for a while. To be fair, he has changed a lot since high school. Physically and otherwise. He's probably changed the most of all of us. I think for the most part that's a really good thing. he's matured a lot. One thing that sucks is that he seems a lot more closed off to friendships and such. It always makes you wonder what the hell happened in the meantime that you weren't talking to these people...
We all had a lovely dinner and then we went back to Paul and Sarah's and hung out for a bit. It was a pretty good night. I'm not even that tired this morning, though I was late to work. By an hour. Ouch.
tonight I'm doing a 501st event in Dorchester with Jason so I've got my NEG shirt on at work. No comments yet. I usually get at least one. Oh, and no one wants to tag along with me to this event so I'll just say that if I get shot we all know who needs to feel bad. Shame, shame. But, as Jason keeps pointing out, the event is for firefighters, cops and EMTs. How much safer can you get?
Something I'm really excited about is next Friday I get to go see The Da Vinci Code with a VERY old friend all the way back from North Brookfield Elementary School. I'm almost done reading the book and he and I both wanted to see the movie so we're going to get together for the first time in 12 years and go do that. I'm really psyched. Nervous too though. These reunion things. . . You never know if you're going to have stuff to say once you finally meet in person or not. However, we seem to have quite a bit in common still beyond the "I was in that second grade class too" so that's always a good thing. :)
The last time we spoke was through text messages and it was right after I left Ray. I felt like everyone was taking "his side", which was hard not to do I'll grant you that, and I kind of withdrew from everyone. I love going to the Sole to see Ericka. It's always a good time. This noisy restaurant in the middle of Worcester. . .
Maybe I should explain who Ericka is. She's in my reference entry, but you people are lazy so you probably haven't read it. Ericka is my big sister. Our families were close enough that had my parents died when I was younger they were going to leave me to Ericka's parents. Craziness. She was the leader of our little group of JWs but she doesn't do much with it anymore. She's on the very outskirts of the religion, which is fine. But it hasn't given me occasion to talk to her much lately. The best part about Ericka was she never cared what anyone else thought.
So we showed up there and I asked if Ericka [insert last name here] was working. They said "yes, but it's not [insert old last name here] anymore; it's [insert new last name here]." Turns out she got married two weeks ago to her boyfriend who also happens to work with her! And she's pregnant. If you had EVER told me that Ericka would be settled down with a family before I was I would have laughed in your face. She just wasn't the type. too free-spirited. But now. . . wow. She's still the same Ericka, but she's changed too. I'm so happy for her. We exhanged numbers of course and I hope we actually stick to our plans to get together.
She seemed happy to see us and she went nuts over Sadie saying how cute she was and taking her on a tour of the restaurant and stuff. When she first came over to us she didn't recognize Joe. That was totally hilarious. At first I thought she was kidding because she totally ignored him and then when he said hi to her she said "Oh, I didn't know if you were with them or not." We all kind of stared at her until Joe said, "I'm Joe [insert HIS last name here]." and then she got it. THAT is a good story. lol. I'll be living off that one for a while. To be fair, he has changed a lot since high school. Physically and otherwise. He's probably changed the most of all of us. I think for the most part that's a really good thing. he's matured a lot. One thing that sucks is that he seems a lot more closed off to friendships and such. It always makes you wonder what the hell happened in the meantime that you weren't talking to these people...
We all had a lovely dinner and then we went back to Paul and Sarah's and hung out for a bit. It was a pretty good night. I'm not even that tired this morning, though I was late to work. By an hour. Ouch.
tonight I'm doing a 501st event in Dorchester with Jason so I've got my NEG shirt on at work. No comments yet. I usually get at least one. Oh, and no one wants to tag along with me to this event so I'll just say that if I get shot we all know who needs to feel bad. Shame, shame. But, as Jason keeps pointing out, the event is for firefighters, cops and EMTs. How much safer can you get?
Something I'm really excited about is next Friday I get to go see The Da Vinci Code with a VERY old friend all the way back from North Brookfield Elementary School. I'm almost done reading the book and he and I both wanted to see the movie so we're going to get together for the first time in 12 years and go do that. I'm really psyched. Nervous too though. These reunion things. . . You never know if you're going to have stuff to say once you finally meet in person or not. However, we seem to have quite a bit in common still beyond the "I was in that second grade class too" so that's always a good thing. :)
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
Top 100 continued again
I promised I'd get to the top 50 book quotes someday. Here they are. I'm sure I'm going to forget some and kick myself later, but I have so very many quotes collected in journals and such that there's not much I can do to avoid that anyway. Enjoy. (The top 50 movie quotes are linked over on the left-hand side of my blog.)
1. "The good writers touch life often. The mediocre ones run a quick hand over her. The bad ones rape her and leave her for the flies."
--Fahrenheit 451
2. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I've loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough.
--The Notebook
High Fidelity was such a good book that it gets a few quotes on the countdown.
3. All relationships need the kind of violent shove that a crush brings.
4. I know what's wrong with Laura. What's wrong with Laura is that I'll never see her for the 1st, 2nd, or 3rd time again.
5. It seems to me that if you place music (and books, probably, and films, and anything that makes you feel) at the center of your being, then you can't afford to sort out your love life, start to think of it as a finished product. You've go to pick at it and unravel it until it all comes apart and you're compelled to start all over again.
6. There comes a time, Laurana, when you've got to risk your life for something you believe in - something that means more than life itself. --Tanis, Dragonlance Chronicles
7. “We may not have won the war,”Tanis
Raistlin coughed and shook his head sadly.
“Do you see no hope?”
“Hope is the denial of reality.”
--Tanis and Raistlin, Dragonlance Chronicles
8. Suicide is just a moment, Lexy told me. . . . The day was hers to choose, and perhaps in that treetop moment when she looked down and saw the yard, the world, her life, spread out below her, perhaps she chose to plunge toward it headlong. Perhaps she saw before her a lifetime of walking on the ruined earth and chose instead a single moment in the air.
--Dogs of Babel
9. "Tata Jesus is bangala!" declares the Reverend every Sunday at the end of his sermon. Bangala means precious and dear. But the way he pronounces it, it means the poisonwood tree. Praise the lord, hallelujah, my friends! For Jesus will make you itch like nobody's business.
--Adah, The Poisonwood Bible
10. "It makes no sense to try, or even to want, to fit into a place where you don't belong...It's not going to happen, and if it ever did, it's not what you would want anyway."
--Jesse Dailey, Geeks
11. Maybe the one positive legacy the Trenchcoat Mafia left was to ensure that this message got heard by a society that seems desperate not to hear it.
--Geeks
12. "I thought you thought I was a bad guy."
"It's a possibility," I said.
"Does that mean you have to kill me?"
I wasn't sure if he was joking or not. I said, "I don't know. What's the location of the rebel base?"
--Cowboy Feng's Space Bar and Grille
13. "You had a crush on her, didn't you?" said Riker.
Wesley glanced at him. "Was it that obvious?"
Riker shrugged. "Teenage boys are very good at thinking they've got their feelings completely hidden." . . .
Riker smiled. "Remember that blue-green outfit of hers?"
"Ohhh, yes. That was my favorite."
"Mine too. Every so often, when I was feeling frivolous, I'd put it on and romp around the holodeck."
Crusher stared at Riker's deadpan expression. "You...?"
"I'm kidding, Wesley."
"Oh." He laughed uncertainly. "Oh."
"Gave you a strange mental picture there for a second, though, didn't it?"
--Imzadi Forever
14. "Hiyyyy!" I yell.
"Don't," he says, backing away.
"Hiyyyy!" I yell, stepping toward him, because threatening children with seventeen-inch knives is funny.
--A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius
15. "... The Ku Klux Klan even used it for a while in the twenties."
"Great," I said.
"Every community had the Klan back then," he said. "It was like a fraternal organization. They put their hoods on and marched in parades on the Fourth of July and so forth."
"Like Rotary, but with cross burnings and lynchings?"
"You have a very peculiar sense of humor."
"Racism is always funny."
--Hinterland
16. "I love you, Allie. I am who I am because of you. You are every reason, every hope, and every dream I've ever had, and no matter what happens to us in the future, every day we are together is the greatest day of my life. I will always be yours."
--The Notebook
17. "Do this." I make the "okay" sign. Clare makes the "okay" sign. "Opposable thumbs means you can do that. It means you can open jars and tie your shoes and other things animals can't do."
Clare is not happy with this. "Sister Carmelita says animals don't have souls."
"Of course animals have souls. Where did she get that idea?"
"She said the Pope says."
"The Pope's an old meanie. Animals have much nicer souls than we do. They never tell lies or blow anybody up."
--The Time Traveler's Wife
18. .... For example, that he would sell the kids to a pedophile ring - for a piffling amount of money - just because it really upset me? True, he loves his kids. But he really, really hates me, so it's a tough one to call.
--How to be good
19. What you don't ever catch a glimpse of on your wedding day - because how could you? - is that some days you will hate your spouse, that you will look at him and regret ever exchanging a word with him, let alone a ring and bodily fluids.
--How to be Good
20. Why do you want to dye your hair, anyways? To look punk? Don't you know, everyone dyes their hair to look punk? Duh.
--Hairstyles of the Damned
21. There is an art, or rather a knack, to flying. The knack lies in learning to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
--Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
22. The last ever dolphin message was misinterpreted as a surprisingly sophisticated attempt to do a double-backwards-somersault through a hoop whilst whistling the "Star Sprangled Banner", but in fact the message was this: So long and thanks for all the fish.
23. The story so far:
In the beginning, the Universe was created.
This has made a lot of people mad and been widely regarded as a bad idea.
24. Ever since I can remember I have loved books. Not just loved, but been passionate about. I regularly spend hours at a time browsing in bookshops, losing track of time, losing myself in another world.
--Bookends
25. I was remembering the way it feels at just that moment when you begin to turn, when you're poised exactly between the things in life you want to do and those you need to do, and it seems for a few blessed seconds that they are all going to be the same.
--While I was gone
26. And there was a voice, a high clear, female voice which said, "Ow," and then, very quietly, it said "Fuck," and then it said "Ow," once more. And then it said nothing at all, and there was silence in the glade.
--Stardust
27. "You are young, and in love," said Primus. "Every young man in your position is the most miserable young man who ever lived."
--Stardust
28. He opened the front door, and breathed a huge and quite heartfelt sigh of relief. It wasn't Jessica. It was - what? Mormons? Jehovah's Witnesses? The police? He couldn't tell. There were two of them, at any rate.
--Neverwhere
29. There are two Londons. There's London Above - that's where you lived - and then there's London Below - the Underside - inhabited by the people who fell through the cracks in the world. Now you're one of them. Good night."
--Neverwhere
30. The first divorce is okay, it can happen to anyone - too young, too romantic, unrealistic - but the second divorce is different. The second divorce is a stigma.
--Best Friends
31. "Love you," she said when she hung up. I didn't respond for a second, surprised to hear those words. We used to say them all the time.
"Love you too," I answered.
--Best Friends
32. "What is love? As far as I can tell,
it is passion, admiration and respect.
If you have two, you have enough.
If you have all three, you don't
have to die to go to heaven."
--William Wharton, Straight Talking
33. I watch Adam's big burly frame as he walks through the restaurant, feeling a pang of affection.
It's funny, isn't it, how your true family are not your flesh and blood? They are the people you meet throughout your life who prove themselves to you. The people who you grow to love, who love you equally in return, who are always there for you.
Mel is my family, Emma and Andy are my family. And now Adam is my family. And it's becoming increasingly difficult to remember what my life was like before I met them.
--Straight Talking
34. We both recline on my couch, feet to head, and watch the movie we have seen together countless times - When Harry Met Sally. Darcy talks out loud constantly, quoting the parts she knows. I don't shush her once. Because even though she says talking during movies irritates Dex, I don't mind. Not even when she gets the line slightly wrong, so that I can't tell what Meg Ryan is really saying. It's just Darcy. This is what she does.
And like a favorite old movie, sometimes the sameness in a friend is what you like the most about her.
--Something Borrowed
35. I'm seventeen and I'm crazy. My uncle says the two always go together. When people ask your age, he said, always say seventeen and insane.
--Fahrenheit 451
36. But you see, Meg, just because we don't understand doesn't mean that the explanation doesn't exist.
--A Wrinkle in Time
37. I held Leo and he held me and we rocked back and forth on the old elm trunk, weeping, and the salt wind brushed against the salt of our tears. And I discovered that there is something almost more intimate about crying that way with someone than there is about kissing, and I knew I'd never again be abel to think of Leo as nothing but a slob.
--A ring of endless light
38. Suzy still sounded angry. "Prayer didn't keep Jeb from being hit bya motorcycle. It didn't stop Grandfather from having leukemia."
"Prayer was never meant to be magic," Mother said.
"Then why bother with it?" Suzy scowled.
"Because it's an act of love," Mother said.
--A ring of endless light
39. "Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows."
--1984
40. We crossed back onto the Maine Turnpike, passing the sign that reads WELCOME TO MAINE: THE WAY LIFE SHOULD BE. I've always hated that sign.
--Love in the Asylum
41. Not all those who wander are lost.
--Lord of the Rings
42. Professor Johnston often said that if you didn't know history, you didn't know anything. You were a leaf that didn't know it was part of a tree.
--Timeline
43. Gently he stroked teh gully dwarf's rough hair. "No, Raistlin would never laugh at you, little one. He knew, he remembered. There were too many who had laughed at him."
--Par-Salian, Time of the Twins
44. They reached the door. Tas regarded it for a moment, then looked up wistfully at Raistlin. "I don't suppose you could. . .sort of swoosh me somewhere, like you did the last time? It's great fun..."
Checking a sigh, Raislin obligingly "swooshed" the kender into a duck pond, to Tas's vast amusement. The kender couldn't recall, in fact, when Raislin had been so nice to him.
It must be because of my ending the Cataclysm, Tas decided. He's probably really grateful, just doesn't know how to express it properly. Or maybe he's not allowed to be grateful since he's evil.
45. "Graphic novels are great, because they're more durable than traditional comics, so they can be read without damaging our precious first printings, heavy enough to be used as a weapon in dire circumstances, and their shiny covers can be used to reflect the sunlight and signal a plane, should the reader become lost or stranded."
--Wil Wheaton
46. Faukman was still shaking his head. “But with all these books written about it, why isn’t this theory more widely known?”
“These books can’t possibly compete with centuries of established history, especially when that history is endorsed by the ultimate best-seller of all time.’
Faukman’s eyes went wide. “:Don’t tell me Harry Potter is actually about the Holy Grail.”
“I was referring to the Bible.”
Faukman cringed. “I knew that.”
--The Da Vinci Code
47. It was, he thought, the difference between being dragged into the arena to face a battle to the death and walking into the arena with your head held high. Some people, perhaps, would say that there was little to choose between the two ways, but Dumbledore knew - and so do I, thought Harry, with a rush of fierce pride, and so did my parents - that there was all the difference in the world.
--Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
48. "We are grateful," Goldmoon said slowly, as if unused to expressing appreciation. "You risk your lives for us, and we are strangers."
Tanis smiled and clasped her hand. "I am Tanis. The brothers are Caramon and Raistlin. The knight is Sturm Brightblade. Flint Fireforge carries the win and Tasslehoff Burrfoot is our clever locksmith. You are Goldmoon and he is Riverwind. There - we are strangers no longer."
--Dragons of Autumn Twilight
49. "While it is nerve-wracking to be in the presence of a kender, it is even more nerve-wracking to discover that a kender has gone off on his own."
--Margaret Weis, footnotes of Dragonlance Chronicles
50. "Wait! Raistlin!" Caramon cried raggedly. "I'll go with you!"
"Would you?" Raistlin asked softly, laying a soothing hand upon the dragon's neck. "Would you go with me into darkness?"
Caramon hesitated, his lips grew dry, fear parched his throat. He could not speak, but he nodded, twice, biting his lip in agony as he heard Tika sobbing behind him.
Raislin regarded him, his eyes golden pools within the deep blackness. "I truly believe you would," the mage marveled, almost to himself.
--Legends
There are so many more quotes that I love. I tried to be balanced about it but Dragonlance just has some really awesome quotes so it has the majority of the list taken. Anyway, that's it for now. If there are books on here that seem unfamiliar I suggest checking them out. They're all on my bookshelves and I love them all. :)
1. "The good writers touch life often. The mediocre ones run a quick hand over her. The bad ones rape her and leave her for the flies."
--Fahrenheit 451
2. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I've loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough.
--The Notebook
High Fidelity was such a good book that it gets a few quotes on the countdown.
3. All relationships need the kind of violent shove that a crush brings.
4. I know what's wrong with Laura. What's wrong with Laura is that I'll never see her for the 1st, 2nd, or 3rd time again.
5. It seems to me that if you place music (and books, probably, and films, and anything that makes you feel) at the center of your being, then you can't afford to sort out your love life, start to think of it as a finished product. You've go to pick at it and unravel it until it all comes apart and you're compelled to start all over again.
6. There comes a time, Laurana, when you've got to risk your life for something you believe in - something that means more than life itself. --Tanis, Dragonlance Chronicles
7. “We may not have won the war,”
Raistlin coughed and shook his head sadly.
“Do you see no hope?”
“Hope is the denial of reality.”
--Tanis and Raistlin, Dragonlance Chronicles
8. Suicide is just a moment, Lexy told me. . . . The day was hers to choose, and perhaps in that treetop moment when she looked down and saw the yard, the world, her life, spread out below her, perhaps she chose to plunge toward it headlong. Perhaps she saw before her a lifetime of walking on the ruined earth and chose instead a single moment in the air.
--Dogs of Babel
9. "Tata Jesus is bangala!" declares the Reverend every Sunday at the end of his sermon. Bangala means precious and dear. But the way he pronounces it, it means the poisonwood tree. Praise the lord, hallelujah, my friends! For Jesus will make you itch like nobody's business.
--Adah, The Poisonwood Bible
10. "It makes no sense to try, or even to want, to fit into a place where you don't belong...It's not going to happen, and if it ever did, it's not what you would want anyway."
--Jesse Dailey, Geeks
11. Maybe the one positive legacy the Trenchcoat Mafia left was to ensure that this message got heard by a society that seems desperate not to hear it.
--Geeks
12. "I thought you thought I was a bad guy."
"It's a possibility," I said.
"Does that mean you have to kill me?"
I wasn't sure if he was joking or not. I said, "I don't know. What's the location of the rebel base?"
--Cowboy Feng's Space Bar and Grille
13. "You had a crush on her, didn't you?" said Riker.
Wesley glanced at him. "Was it that obvious?"
Riker shrugged. "Teenage boys are very good at thinking they've got their feelings completely hidden." . . .
Riker smiled. "Remember that blue-green outfit of hers?"
"Ohhh, yes. That was my favorite."
"Mine too. Every so often, when I was feeling frivolous, I'd put it on and romp around the holodeck."
Crusher stared at Riker's deadpan expression. "You...?"
"I'm kidding, Wesley."
"Oh." He laughed uncertainly. "Oh."
"Gave you a strange mental picture there for a second, though, didn't it?"
--Imzadi Forever
14. "Hiyyyy!" I yell.
"Don't," he says, backing away.
"Hiyyyy!" I yell, stepping toward him, because threatening children with seventeen-inch knives is funny.
--A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius
15. "... The Ku Klux Klan even used it for a while in the twenties."
"Great," I said.
"Every community had the Klan back then," he said. "It was like a fraternal organization. They put their hoods on and marched in parades on the Fourth of July and so forth."
"Like Rotary, but with cross burnings and lynchings?"
"You have a very peculiar sense of humor."
"Racism is always funny."
--Hinterland
16. "I love you, Allie. I am who I am because of you. You are every reason, every hope, and every dream I've ever had, and no matter what happens to us in the future, every day we are together is the greatest day of my life. I will always be yours."
--The Notebook
17. "Do this." I make the "okay" sign. Clare makes the "okay" sign. "Opposable thumbs means you can do that. It means you can open jars and tie your shoes and other things animals can't do."
Clare is not happy with this. "Sister Carmelita says animals don't have souls."
"Of course animals have souls. Where did she get that idea?"
"She said the Pope says."
"The Pope's an old meanie. Animals have much nicer souls than we do. They never tell lies or blow anybody up."
--The Time Traveler's Wife
18. .... For example, that he would sell the kids to a pedophile ring - for a piffling amount of money - just because it really upset me? True, he loves his kids. But he really, really hates me, so it's a tough one to call.
--How to be good
19. What you don't ever catch a glimpse of on your wedding day - because how could you? - is that some days you will hate your spouse, that you will look at him and regret ever exchanging a word with him, let alone a ring and bodily fluids.
--How to be Good
20. Why do you want to dye your hair, anyways? To look punk? Don't you know, everyone dyes their hair to look punk? Duh.
--Hairstyles of the Damned
21. There is an art, or rather a knack, to flying. The knack lies in learning to throw yourself at the ground and miss.
--Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
22. The last ever dolphin message was misinterpreted as a surprisingly sophisticated attempt to do a double-backwards-somersault through a hoop whilst whistling the "Star Sprangled Banner", but in fact the message was this: So long and thanks for all the fish.
23. The story so far:
In the beginning, the Universe was created.
This has made a lot of people mad and been widely regarded as a bad idea.
24. Ever since I can remember I have loved books. Not just loved, but been passionate about. I regularly spend hours at a time browsing in bookshops, losing track of time, losing myself in another world.
--Bookends
25. I was remembering the way it feels at just that moment when you begin to turn, when you're poised exactly between the things in life you want to do and those you need to do, and it seems for a few blessed seconds that they are all going to be the same.
--While I was gone
26. And there was a voice, a high clear, female voice which said, "Ow," and then, very quietly, it said "Fuck," and then it said "Ow," once more. And then it said nothing at all, and there was silence in the glade.
--Stardust
27. "You are young, and in love," said Primus. "Every young man in your position is the most miserable young man who ever lived."
--Stardust
28. He opened the front door, and breathed a huge and quite heartfelt sigh of relief. It wasn't Jessica. It was - what? Mormons? Jehovah's Witnesses? The police? He couldn't tell. There were two of them, at any rate.
--Neverwhere
29. There are two Londons. There's London Above - that's where you lived - and then there's London Below - the Underside - inhabited by the people who fell through the cracks in the world. Now you're one of them. Good night."
--Neverwhere
30. The first divorce is okay, it can happen to anyone - too young, too romantic, unrealistic - but the second divorce is different. The second divorce is a stigma.
--Best Friends
31. "Love you," she said when she hung up. I didn't respond for a second, surprised to hear those words. We used to say them all the time.
"Love you too," I answered.
--Best Friends
32. "What is love? As far as I can tell,
it is passion, admiration and respect.
If you have two, you have enough.
If you have all three, you don't
have to die to go to heaven."
--William Wharton, Straight Talking
33. I watch Adam's big burly frame as he walks through the restaurant, feeling a pang of affection.
It's funny, isn't it, how your true family are not your flesh and blood? They are the people you meet throughout your life who prove themselves to you. The people who you grow to love, who love you equally in return, who are always there for you.
Mel is my family, Emma and Andy are my family. And now Adam is my family. And it's becoming increasingly difficult to remember what my life was like before I met them.
--Straight Talking
34. We both recline on my couch, feet to head, and watch the movie we have seen together countless times - When Harry Met Sally. Darcy talks out loud constantly, quoting the parts she knows. I don't shush her once. Because even though she says talking during movies irritates Dex, I don't mind. Not even when she gets the line slightly wrong, so that I can't tell what Meg Ryan is really saying. It's just Darcy. This is what she does.
And like a favorite old movie, sometimes the sameness in a friend is what you like the most about her.
--Something Borrowed
35. I'm seventeen and I'm crazy. My uncle says the two always go together. When people ask your age, he said, always say seventeen and insane.
--Fahrenheit 451
36. But you see, Meg, just because we don't understand doesn't mean that the explanation doesn't exist.
--A Wrinkle in Time
37. I held Leo and he held me and we rocked back and forth on the old elm trunk, weeping, and the salt wind brushed against the salt of our tears. And I discovered that there is something almost more intimate about crying that way with someone than there is about kissing, and I knew I'd never again be abel to think of Leo as nothing but a slob.
--A ring of endless light
38. Suzy still sounded angry. "Prayer didn't keep Jeb from being hit bya motorcycle. It didn't stop Grandfather from having leukemia."
"Prayer was never meant to be magic," Mother said.
"Then why bother with it?" Suzy scowled.
"Because it's an act of love," Mother said.
--A ring of endless light
39. "Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows."
--1984
40. We crossed back onto the Maine Turnpike, passing the sign that reads WELCOME TO MAINE: THE WAY LIFE SHOULD BE. I've always hated that sign.
--Love in the Asylum
41. Not all those who wander are lost.
--Lord of the Rings
42. Professor Johnston often said that if you didn't know history, you didn't know anything. You were a leaf that didn't know it was part of a tree.
--Timeline
43. Gently he stroked teh gully dwarf's rough hair. "No, Raistlin would never laugh at you, little one. He knew, he remembered. There were too many who had laughed at him."
--Par-Salian, Time of the Twins
44. They reached the door. Tas regarded it for a moment, then looked up wistfully at Raistlin. "I don't suppose you could. . .sort of swoosh me somewhere, like you did the last time? It's great fun..."
Checking a sigh, Raislin obligingly "swooshed" the kender into a duck pond, to Tas's vast amusement. The kender couldn't recall, in fact, when Raislin had been so nice to him.
It must be because of my ending the Cataclysm, Tas decided. He's probably really grateful, just doesn't know how to express it properly. Or maybe he's not allowed to be grateful since he's evil.
45. "Graphic novels are great, because they're more durable than traditional comics, so they can be read without damaging our precious first printings, heavy enough to be used as a weapon in dire circumstances, and their shiny covers can be used to reflect the sunlight and signal a plane, should the reader become lost or stranded."
--Wil Wheaton
46. Faukman was still shaking his head. “But with all these books written about it, why isn’t this theory more widely known?”
“These books can’t possibly compete with centuries of established history, especially when that history is endorsed by the ultimate best-seller of all time.’
Faukman’s eyes went wide. “:Don’t tell me Harry Potter is actually about the Holy Grail.”
“I was referring to the Bible.”
Faukman cringed. “I knew that.”
--The Da Vinci Code
47. It was, he thought, the difference between being dragged into the arena to face a battle to the death and walking into the arena with your head held high. Some people, perhaps, would say that there was little to choose between the two ways, but Dumbledore knew - and so do I, thought Harry, with a rush of fierce pride, and so did my parents - that there was all the difference in the world.
--Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
48. "We are grateful," Goldmoon said slowly, as if unused to expressing appreciation. "You risk your lives for us, and we are strangers."
Tanis smiled and clasped her hand. "I am Tanis. The brothers are Caramon and Raistlin. The knight is Sturm Brightblade. Flint Fireforge carries the win and Tasslehoff Burrfoot is our clever locksmith. You are Goldmoon and he is Riverwind. There - we are strangers no longer."
--Dragons of Autumn Twilight
49. "While it is nerve-wracking to be in the presence of a kender, it is even more nerve-wracking to discover that a kender has gone off on his own."
--Margaret Weis, footnotes of Dragonlance Chronicles
50. "Wait! Raistlin!" Caramon cried raggedly. "I'll go with you!"
"Would you?" Raistlin asked softly, laying a soothing hand upon the dragon's neck. "Would you go with me into darkness?"
Caramon hesitated, his lips grew dry, fear parched his throat. He could not speak, but he nodded, twice, biting his lip in agony as he heard Tika sobbing behind him.
Raislin regarded him, his eyes golden pools within the deep blackness. "I truly believe you would," the mage marveled, almost to himself.
--Legends
There are so many more quotes that I love. I tried to be balanced about it but Dragonlance just has some really awesome quotes so it has the majority of the list taken. Anyway, that's it for now. If there are books on here that seem unfamiliar I suggest checking them out. They're all on my bookshelves and I love them all. :)
Monday, May 08, 2006
United 93
First reaction? Wow. Just wow.
I went to see this alone tonight. I didn't think many people would want to go with me and since a couple were busy anyway I thought maybe I could soak it up better by myself.
The eeriness comes from the fact that everything for the first hour or so is so normal. Life just goes on like it would on any other morning. They used actual footage of the second plane hitting the WTC. That was a big moment. And the filmmakers gave you just enough time to tear up a bit before starting up the action again. Literally everyone on screen just stood there not knowing what to do.
The most frustrating part had to be the military trying to get permission to take down the planes. They had to get it from the President who was no where to be found. I'm so glad I watched Fahrenheit 9/11. The result was that a plane hit the Pentagon when it could have been shot down first. Not that either choice was savory.
I don't want to ruin it for anyone so be warned that there is a slight spoiler ahead...
The ending shot is amazing. Just as the passengers break through the cockpit you see what they would have seen as the plane crashed. The screen goes black just as the nose of the plane hit the ground. It was intense to say the least. The whole theater was silent.
Sum up - I'm glad I saw it but wouldn't pay another $9.25 to see it again. And I'm reallly glad I saw it by myself. I've never seen any movie by myself and this was a great one to start with. I got to sit there in silence with my own thoughts. Just what I needed.
I went to see this alone tonight. I didn't think many people would want to go with me and since a couple were busy anyway I thought maybe I could soak it up better by myself.
The eeriness comes from the fact that everything for the first hour or so is so normal. Life just goes on like it would on any other morning. They used actual footage of the second plane hitting the WTC. That was a big moment. And the filmmakers gave you just enough time to tear up a bit before starting up the action again. Literally everyone on screen just stood there not knowing what to do.
The most frustrating part had to be the military trying to get permission to take down the planes. They had to get it from the President who was no where to be found. I'm so glad I watched Fahrenheit 9/11. The result was that a plane hit the Pentagon when it could have been shot down first. Not that either choice was savory.
I don't want to ruin it for anyone so be warned that there is a slight spoiler ahead...
The ending shot is amazing. Just as the passengers break through the cockpit you see what they would have seen as the plane crashed. The screen goes black just as the nose of the plane hit the ground. It was intense to say the least. The whole theater was silent.
Sum up - I'm glad I saw it but wouldn't pay another $9.25 to see it again. And I'm reallly glad I saw it by myself. I've never seen any movie by myself and this was a great one to start with. I got to sit there in silence with my own thoughts. Just what I needed.
Friday, May 05, 2006
Goodbye On-call
For now anyway. I handed the phone off to J this morning; glad to do it. I didn't get any calls last night which was good.
I had a busy day of running around though. First I had work of course. We all had a fairly good day together. One of the new girls, now known as "L", is pretty cool. She and I worked on a case the other day together that was horribly frustrating but really amusing. They all let me leave about 20 minutes early yesterday so that I could try returning that movie before the on-call phone started ringing. As I was getting ready to leave, L said she was reading something online about it being a Star Wars day. I guess because it was the fourth of May, they said "may the fourth be with you". Cheesiness. So they made fun of me for that. Good stuff.
I went home and let Pixel out and then got ready to go back out. I drove out and returned the DVD and then I drove on to my parent's house. A package arrived for me. I ordered a bamboo curtain for my bedroom door. Don't worry, I didn't pay $84 for it. So I picked that up and saw my mom momentarily and then drove on to Sarah and Paul's house.
Paul and I went out to get Subway for us all. There were two girls from nichols college in there. ::sigh::. . . .they made me feel old because I just wanted to smack them. One says, "I'm so going to totally eat a wicked lot tonight."
"Yea, that'll help."
"Cuz you know I wanna get drunk but I don't wanna get as drunk as last time."
"Yea."
Paul and I were biting our lips to keep from laughing. It took all my energy to not turn to him and in my best valley girl impersonation say "I totally don't plan on getting as drunk as last time tonight." People like that just annoy me. Why would you walk into a Subway and just start talking about how drunk you're going to get? Honestly... None of us care to hear your loudmouth conversation. Grow up.
::rant over::
Then I hung out there and then went over to Joe's to watch tv. Getting ready this morning was so annoying. I was awake by 6 and took Pixel out and that dog just does not want to be housetrained. Grrr. Then I left for work and here I am.
I think we might all go out for ice cream cake later. Yumminess. :)
I had a busy day of running around though. First I had work of course. We all had a fairly good day together. One of the new girls, now known as "L", is pretty cool. She and I worked on a case the other day together that was horribly frustrating but really amusing. They all let me leave about 20 minutes early yesterday so that I could try returning that movie before the on-call phone started ringing. As I was getting ready to leave, L said she was reading something online about it being a Star Wars day. I guess because it was the fourth of May, they said "may the fourth be with you". Cheesiness. So they made fun of me for that. Good stuff.
I went home and let Pixel out and then got ready to go back out. I drove out and returned the DVD and then I drove on to my parent's house. A package arrived for me. I ordered a bamboo curtain for my bedroom door. Don't worry, I didn't pay $84 for it. So I picked that up and saw my mom momentarily and then drove on to Sarah and Paul's house.
Paul and I went out to get Subway for us all. There were two girls from nichols college in there. ::sigh::. . . .they made me feel old because I just wanted to smack them. One says, "I'm so going to totally eat a wicked lot tonight."
"Yea, that'll help."
"Cuz you know I wanna get drunk but I don't wanna get as drunk as last time."
"Yea."
Paul and I were biting our lips to keep from laughing. It took all my energy to not turn to him and in my best valley girl impersonation say "I totally don't plan on getting as drunk as last time tonight." People like that just annoy me. Why would you walk into a Subway and just start talking about how drunk you're going to get? Honestly... None of us care to hear your loudmouth conversation. Grow up.
::rant over::
Then I hung out there and then went over to Joe's to watch tv. Getting ready this morning was so annoying. I was awake by 6 and took Pixel out and that dog just does not want to be housetrained. Grrr. Then I left for work and here I am.
I think we might all go out for ice cream cake later. Yumminess. :)
Thursday, May 04, 2006
Just Cool
This is the sound of settling
I've got a hunger
twisting my stomach into knots
that my tongue was tied off
my brain's repeating
"if you've got an impulse let it out"
but they never make it past my mouth.
baa bah, this is the sound of settling
baa bah, baa bah
our youth is fleeting
old age is just around the bend
and i can't wait to go gray
and i'll sit and wonder
of every love that could've been
if i'd only thought of something charming to say.
baa bah, this is the sound of settling
baa bah, baa bah
i've got a hunger twisting my stomach into knots.
I had a rough night last night. I was on-call for J again. I got a LOT of overtime. I basically worked from 8 a.m. to midnight on cases. I got four phone calls. They started coming in before I was even home. I wanted to drive out to Spencer to return Elizabethtown to Big Video but I had to turn around and head right home instead. All the cases were annoying and terrible complicated. It was very frustrating.
Between all that I cleaned out all my old paperwork and bills and such so I'd know what I have to pay this Saturday. I also talked to my landlord yesterday. He had come into my house on Monday to get my lease and had left a note on my kitchen table about water on the bathroom floor leaking down to my downstairs neighbor. I'm so not comfortable with my landlord (or anyone) coming into my house when I'm not there so I called him on it. He said he just had to get the lease and he would never do it again. I know that it's illegal for him to anyway without calling me first if it's an emergency so I'm not too worried about it.
I watched some meaningless television. "Deja Q" was on so I laughed out loud at Q and Worf exchanging banter for a little while. I also watched South Park which I hardly ever watch. While I did that I chatted with my friend Steve from myspace and also with Joe. Had a lovely argument with Joe so that totally made my night. Yea. . . Just as I was getting ready for bed around 11 my phone rang and it was this guy Keith I went to college with. We hadn't talked in a few years but I found him on myspace last week or so. So we talked for about an hour. That was nice. He's a big Star Wars fan like I am so we mostly talked about that.
I'm pretty sure I got a call from my friend Seth (also a df'd JW) at about 1 a.m. but I could have dreamed that up. I was pretty tired. lol. As Paul said, I'm popular. Yea, right. That'll be the day. But it was a good, if chaotic, night.
I'm hoping tonight will be slower with phone calls and such. I do not want a repeat of last night.
The five of us are in a conference room training still. We have been for a month. good times. Oh, and I'm going on a business trip to California still in June. Save me....
twisting my stomach into knots
that my tongue was tied off
my brain's repeating
"if you've got an impulse let it out"
but they never make it past my mouth.
baa bah, this is the sound of settling
baa bah, baa bah
our youth is fleeting
old age is just around the bend
and i can't wait to go gray
and i'll sit and wonder
of every love that could've been
if i'd only thought of something charming to say.
baa bah, this is the sound of settling
baa bah, baa bah
i've got a hunger twisting my stomach into knots.
I had a rough night last night. I was on-call for J again. I got a LOT of overtime. I basically worked from 8 a.m. to midnight on cases. I got four phone calls. They started coming in before I was even home. I wanted to drive out to Spencer to return Elizabethtown to Big Video but I had to turn around and head right home instead. All the cases were annoying and terrible complicated. It was very frustrating.
Between all that I cleaned out all my old paperwork and bills and such so I'd know what I have to pay this Saturday. I also talked to my landlord yesterday. He had come into my house on Monday to get my lease and had left a note on my kitchen table about water on the bathroom floor leaking down to my downstairs neighbor. I'm so not comfortable with my landlord (or anyone) coming into my house when I'm not there so I called him on it. He said he just had to get the lease and he would never do it again. I know that it's illegal for him to anyway without calling me first if it's an emergency so I'm not too worried about it.
I watched some meaningless television. "Deja Q" was on so I laughed out loud at Q and Worf exchanging banter for a little while. I also watched South Park which I hardly ever watch. While I did that I chatted with my friend Steve from myspace and also with Joe. Had a lovely argument with Joe so that totally made my night. Yea. . . Just as I was getting ready for bed around 11 my phone rang and it was this guy Keith I went to college with. We hadn't talked in a few years but I found him on myspace last week or so. So we talked for about an hour. That was nice. He's a big Star Wars fan like I am so we mostly talked about that.
I'm pretty sure I got a call from my friend Seth (also a df'd JW) at about 1 a.m. but I could have dreamed that up. I was pretty tired. lol. As Paul said, I'm popular. Yea, right. That'll be the day. But it was a good, if chaotic, night.
I'm hoping tonight will be slower with phone calls and such. I do not want a repeat of last night.
The five of us are in a conference room training still. We have been for a month. good times. Oh, and I'm going on a business trip to California still in June. Save me....
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
You had a bad day
Is it just me or is that song WAY overplayed on the radio lately? I love it and all but this is why people get sick of generic radio music. Every station plays the same songs over and over until something that was well-written and lovely becomes annoying.
I watched Elizabethtown last night. It was interesting. Not as cute as I was hoping for. The best parts were probably them on the phone at the beginning because you can totally watch it and remember having all night fascinating conversations like that with people. They could have taken a much different turn with that movie. I really think that the trailers made it look like they were going to be on the phone through the whole thing and that they should have stuck with that idea. It would have made the movie more intense and interesting if the characters did not meet up again until later.
The one thing that's good is that I do like more typical love stories like that. At least they have a chance in hell of actually happening in real life. Romance movies have built girls up for disappointment since the first one was ever produced.
I sound awfully negative, eh? Not meaning to. Just having one of those days I guess.
My mom wants me to get reinstated so badly. She's on me about it every time I see her. I'd love to know what would happen if I said I didn't want to be. And I'm not saying that by any means, but I just wonder what would happen. I wonder if she and dad would still want to be as helpful as they have been lately. Dad might not care.... then again, when I was younger, he always yelled at me if I didn't want to go to meetings with Mom and pitched a fit about it. Kind of ironic, huh? Since he never went himself.
I wonder sometimes if I could ever give up my religion to be with someone who wasn't a Witness. It's something I've considered before of course... But if I truly believe in God, which I do, then there's no way I could ever do that. I love my spirituality. It is such a huge part of my life and always has been.
One of my friends found out she is pregnant yesterday. She seems genuinely excited about it. Personally I think she'll make a great mom. She is so upbeat most of the time and is just a pleasant person to deal with. She cares a lot about people and she's a sweetie. I ran over to give her a hug because (I said) "that's what I do". :) I'm a little sad too. John and I were going to start trying for kids in November. That life I had a month ago seems so far away from where I am now. I always feel very far behind on my "life checklist".
Get married - check
But then I got divorced...
Try again - check
Called that off.
Have kids - so not checked
Live in a house - yea.... I'm in a tenemant.
I've got some definite life experience checked off (like divorce and getting DF'd) but nothing that sticks.
I watched Elizabethtown last night. It was interesting. Not as cute as I was hoping for. The best parts were probably them on the phone at the beginning because you can totally watch it and remember having all night fascinating conversations like that with people. They could have taken a much different turn with that movie. I really think that the trailers made it look like they were going to be on the phone through the whole thing and that they should have stuck with that idea. It would have made the movie more intense and interesting if the characters did not meet up again until later.
The one thing that's good is that I do like more typical love stories like that. At least they have a chance in hell of actually happening in real life. Romance movies have built girls up for disappointment since the first one was ever produced.
I sound awfully negative, eh? Not meaning to. Just having one of those days I guess.
My mom wants me to get reinstated so badly. She's on me about it every time I see her. I'd love to know what would happen if I said I didn't want to be. And I'm not saying that by any means, but I just wonder what would happen. I wonder if she and dad would still want to be as helpful as they have been lately. Dad might not care.... then again, when I was younger, he always yelled at me if I didn't want to go to meetings with Mom and pitched a fit about it. Kind of ironic, huh? Since he never went himself.
I wonder sometimes if I could ever give up my religion to be with someone who wasn't a Witness. It's something I've considered before of course... But if I truly believe in God, which I do, then there's no way I could ever do that. I love my spirituality. It is such a huge part of my life and always has been.
One of my friends found out she is pregnant yesterday. She seems genuinely excited about it. Personally I think she'll make a great mom. She is so upbeat most of the time and is just a pleasant person to deal with. She cares a lot about people and she's a sweetie. I ran over to give her a hug because (I said) "that's what I do". :) I'm a little sad too. John and I were going to start trying for kids in November. That life I had a month ago seems so far away from where I am now. I always feel very far behind on my "life checklist".
Get married - check
But then I got divorced...
Try again - check
Called that off.
Have kids - so not checked
Live in a house - yea.... I'm in a tenemant.
I've got some definite life experience checked off (like divorce and getting DF'd) but nothing that sticks.
Monday, May 01, 2006
What would I give
I've had my palm pilot for about three years now. It had every number I've ever needed, a ton of lists of things I need to do or buy, my entire schedule for the next year, so on and so forth. When I moved out of John's I couldn't find my charger right away. Well, silly me, I forgot that one of the warnings about it is if you let the battery run all the way down it will reset itself. I found the charger yesterday and plugged it in and fired up the palm pilot. It came up with the settings, which confused me....
I fixed the settings back to the right time and such and then started scrolling through my categories. Nothing. it's all gone. Every phone number I've ever gotten for work, home, whatever; it's all gone. My schedule is gone. My list of all the dvds, cds, and books that I want is gone. Every password I had ever saved on there is gone. I am so pissed, but what can I do? I have to start over now. Ah, what a great metaphor for my life.
I spent my first weekend at the apartment. It's lovely. i got all my stuff moved in. Paul and Joe brought their trailer out and got my furniture for me and moved it in cuz they rock. Sarah and Sadie came too. I treated everyone to Hot Dog Annie's afterward. It's this semi-famous place out here in Mass. I really love hanging out with all of them again. I can't believe that I missed four years out of all of our lives. But what could I do? I was living with my parents when Sarah got df'd... I had no choice. Not that that justifies it to me. It probably never will. I'll probably always feel guilty a little bit. I missed SO MUCH. Not just Sadie growing up, but stuff that went on in Paul and Sarah's lives and Joe's too. I wish I could have been there for all of them. I wish they could have been there for me at times too. "That's it; you're out of the herd!!"
I've been thinking a lot about my life lately - past, present, and future. It's hard not to with all the huge changes I've gone through lately. I kind of feel like I'm going to be the crazy bird lady all by myself, never get married or have kids.... That would be sad. I know that's probably not the case. Paul tells me not to limit myself so much and all. But it's hard to take someone else's advice about relationship stuff like that...
Going back to school is something I've been pondering. I just don't have the money or the time right now. Maybe I'll give myself the summer to relax and then start looking into classes in September that would start in the winter semester. It's been running through my head a bit because some of my friends have been saying "Oh, you were the 'smart one'. I can't believe you dropped out of college." If they had seen my life then they would have believed it. Let's see, what wasn't going on then?? I had just gotten married, I had two jobs, I was trying to make it to all my religious meetings, I was going to college full time, and I was trying to manage a household for the first time with all our pets. Something had to go and unfortunately it was college.
That's the only explanation I have for now. I don't even know what I'd do with a college degree... I don't need it for my job. I don't even know what I want to do with my life. "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Happy.
I fixed the settings back to the right time and such and then started scrolling through my categories. Nothing. it's all gone. Every phone number I've ever gotten for work, home, whatever; it's all gone. My schedule is gone. My list of all the dvds, cds, and books that I want is gone. Every password I had ever saved on there is gone. I am so pissed, but what can I do? I have to start over now. Ah, what a great metaphor for my life.
I spent my first weekend at the apartment. It's lovely. i got all my stuff moved in. Paul and Joe brought their trailer out and got my furniture for me and moved it in cuz they rock. Sarah and Sadie came too. I treated everyone to Hot Dog Annie's afterward. It's this semi-famous place out here in Mass. I really love hanging out with all of them again. I can't believe that I missed four years out of all of our lives. But what could I do? I was living with my parents when Sarah got df'd... I had no choice. Not that that justifies it to me. It probably never will. I'll probably always feel guilty a little bit. I missed SO MUCH. Not just Sadie growing up, but stuff that went on in Paul and Sarah's lives and Joe's too. I wish I could have been there for all of them. I wish they could have been there for me at times too. "That's it; you're out of the herd!!"
I've been thinking a lot about my life lately - past, present, and future. It's hard not to with all the huge changes I've gone through lately. I kind of feel like I'm going to be the crazy bird lady all by myself, never get married or have kids.... That would be sad. I know that's probably not the case. Paul tells me not to limit myself so much and all. But it's hard to take someone else's advice about relationship stuff like that...
Going back to school is something I've been pondering. I just don't have the money or the time right now. Maybe I'll give myself the summer to relax and then start looking into classes in September that would start in the winter semester. It's been running through my head a bit because some of my friends have been saying "Oh, you were the 'smart one'. I can't believe you dropped out of college." If they had seen my life then they would have believed it. Let's see, what wasn't going on then?? I had just gotten married, I had two jobs, I was trying to make it to all my religious meetings, I was going to college full time, and I was trying to manage a household for the first time with all our pets. Something had to go and unfortunately it was college.
That's the only explanation I have for now. I don't even know what I'd do with a college degree... I don't need it for my job. I don't even know what I want to do with my life. "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Happy.
Theme - First Kiss
Another open diary theme entry. I'm lacking for inspiration on this cold New England morning. Isn't it supposed to be spring? But I digress...
How old were you when you got your first kiss?
Well, one of my first boyfriends was this guy John when I was 13. I used to work after school as a preschool teacher's aide when I went to Woodland Academy. Between when the school closed down and when my ride came to get me (they didn't have bus services since it was a private school) was usually about 20 minutes. So I used to hang out with John outside. I guess I got my first kiss then. We were pretty young so it's not like it was a big deal even at the time. I don't think I made very much of it. It wasn't a "real" kiss by usual standards I suppose.
That still counts as my first kiss, though.
My first actual kiss was when I was. . . must have been 16. 15? I have a really bad memory about stuff like that. It's like that scene in "Mr and Mrs Smith".
"We've been married five years."
"Six."
"Right, five or six years..."
So I was 15 or 16 or so. I was dating this guy Joe from my high school and he was my first kiss that I really count.
The sad thing is, I couldn't tell you where or when it happened really. Like I said, my memory is horrid. If it weren't for journals that I kept I'd swear that I had no childhood. Seriously. It's not that I don't want to remember this stuff; I just can't. But I know it was Joe so that's about all I've got. High school was such a really happy time for me so I wish I could remember more specific experiences. I have to be reminded of them all the time. . .
How old were you when you got your first kiss?
Well, one of my first boyfriends was this guy John when I was 13. I used to work after school as a preschool teacher's aide when I went to Woodland Academy. Between when the school closed down and when my ride came to get me (they didn't have bus services since it was a private school) was usually about 20 minutes. So I used to hang out with John outside. I guess I got my first kiss then. We were pretty young so it's not like it was a big deal even at the time. I don't think I made very much of it. It wasn't a "real" kiss by usual standards I suppose.
That still counts as my first kiss, though.
My first actual kiss was when I was. . . must have been 16. 15? I have a really bad memory about stuff like that. It's like that scene in "Mr and Mrs Smith".
"We've been married five years."
"Six."
"Right, five or six years..."
So I was 15 or 16 or so. I was dating this guy Joe from my high school and he was my first kiss that I really count.
The sad thing is, I couldn't tell you where or when it happened really. Like I said, my memory is horrid. If it weren't for journals that I kept I'd swear that I had no childhood. Seriously. It's not that I don't want to remember this stuff; I just can't. But I know it was Joe so that's about all I've got. High school was such a really happy time for me so I wish I could remember more specific experiences. I have to be reminded of them all the time. . .
Here, truly, there be dragons. --Stardust
Jade feels 
About Me
- Name: MaraJade
- Location: New England, United States
I'm 26 yrs old. I'm a total geek and I love being one of the few true girl geeks out there. I've traveled across the U.S. and lived in a few states. I've thoroughly enjoyed it and feel like my heart belongs on the west coast. I want to be a writer someday and own a bookshop. I also love photography and the arts. I was disfellowshipped for four years but just got reinstated and therefore am one of Jehovah's Witnesses again.
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- QuIzZeS
- Heart of an Empire
- The funniest thing you will ever watch!
- My Website
- My Space
- I put a lot of spiritual JW updates in this blog here.
- Top 50 movie quotes entry
Read this if you don't understand a blog entry. It's my reference entry.
The month of
My Photo Blog
Cost of the War in Iraq
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