Customer Support Hints
Brian wrote a post that made me think. I work at a rather large worldwide company. In that company my job is to generate and distribute software license keys to those who are entitled to them. This means checking sales orders, knowing what the person needs, and finding the right combination of key for them. It is a complicated job, I am not ashamed to admit. The kicker is there are three of us on the global licensing team. Do you know why "global" is in there? That's right. Because it's.....global. So - 3 people + thousands of customers + being underpaid and overworked = stressful job.
Here are some things to think about next time you call tech support, customer support, or any kind of call center.
1. I do not want to keep things from you. I am not sitting at my computer thinking "How can I ruin this person's day?" If I could give you your license key, I would. Trust me. You getting your key means you will LEAVE ME ALONE.
2. Don't lie to me. When you call up and say, "My call back time was two hours and no one's called me." AND you are dumb enough to give me your case number, don't think that I'm not staring right at it knowing that you only opened your case a half hour ago. Lying will only anger us and make us put you on hold for ten minutes.
3. When you email us and get an automatic bounceback message that says we work from 8 to 5 EST and you can call after hours with EMERGENCIES, what does that mean to you?? Does it mean that I am sitting at my desk at work just waiting for an emergency to come through? Um, no. Emergencies mean that there is an on-call person who is at home sleeping. Do not wake me up to "just run this by" me. I value my sleep.
4. Being sarcastic will get you no where.
5. We also do not appreciate comments such as "This has been as helpful as poking sharp sticks in my eyes."
6. If you knew for two weeks that you would need a key from us and you didn't email us until today, why is that our fault? That bounceback message (see #3) states our response time is 24 hours. 24 hours....24 hours....Mull that over for a bit. Does 24 hours equal 20 minutes in your demented little world? Well, it doesn't in mine so plan ahead!
7. Sales orders = revenue. When you are a customer I can grant you some leeway with not wanting to fuss over sales orders. When you are a fellow employee who "just needs to get this done for the customer" and you are telling me to "skip the paperwork" that makes me want to track down your manager and tell them how eager you are for the company to lose money. Sales orders are not "just paperwork". They are what our salaries come from.
8. If you must wake me up with an emergency call, be pleasant. It will go such a long way.
9. Don't yell at me when I tell you something isn't physically possible. While I'm very sorry that you purchased the wrong licenses, that does not mean I can physically beat those codes into your hardware to make the key work. Ever heard the expression "square peg, round hole"? That is what you are trying to make me do.
10. Last but not least; what does "email ONLY group" mean to you?? Apparently it means that you call us ten times a day and use the on call number to bug us at 3 a.m. for a question about nothing. Apparently that means that when I ask you to email me your info (keep in mind, so that YOU can get your key FASTER) you feel you have the right to yell at me about it.
Be kind to your customer service/tech people. They're holding on to one small part of your lives and we can really make it go either way.
Here are some things to think about next time you call tech support, customer support, or any kind of call center.
1. I do not want to keep things from you. I am not sitting at my computer thinking "How can I ruin this person's day?" If I could give you your license key, I would. Trust me. You getting your key means you will LEAVE ME ALONE.
2. Don't lie to me. When you call up and say, "My call back time was two hours and no one's called me." AND you are dumb enough to give me your case number, don't think that I'm not staring right at it knowing that you only opened your case a half hour ago. Lying will only anger us and make us put you on hold for ten minutes.
3. When you email us and get an automatic bounceback message that says we work from 8 to 5 EST and you can call after hours with EMERGENCIES, what does that mean to you?? Does it mean that I am sitting at my desk at work just waiting for an emergency to come through? Um, no. Emergencies mean that there is an on-call person who is at home sleeping. Do not wake me up to "just run this by" me. I value my sleep.
4. Being sarcastic will get you no where.
5. We also do not appreciate comments such as "This has been as helpful as poking sharp sticks in my eyes."
6. If you knew for two weeks that you would need a key from us and you didn't email us until today, why is that our fault? That bounceback message (see #3) states our response time is 24 hours. 24 hours....24 hours....Mull that over for a bit. Does 24 hours equal 20 minutes in your demented little world? Well, it doesn't in mine so plan ahead!
7. Sales orders = revenue. When you are a customer I can grant you some leeway with not wanting to fuss over sales orders. When you are a fellow employee who "just needs to get this done for the customer" and you are telling me to "skip the paperwork" that makes me want to track down your manager and tell them how eager you are for the company to lose money. Sales orders are not "just paperwork". They are what our salaries come from.
8. If you must wake me up with an emergency call, be pleasant. It will go such a long way.
9. Don't yell at me when I tell you something isn't physically possible. While I'm very sorry that you purchased the wrong licenses, that does not mean I can physically beat those codes into your hardware to make the key work. Ever heard the expression "square peg, round hole"? That is what you are trying to make me do.
10. Last but not least; what does "email ONLY group" mean to you?? Apparently it means that you call us ten times a day and use the on call number to bug us at 3 a.m. for a question about nothing. Apparently that means that when I ask you to email me your info (keep in mind, so that YOU can get your key FASTER) you feel you have the right to yell at me about it.
Be kind to your customer service/tech people. They're holding on to one small part of your lives and we can really make it go either way.
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